Tuesday, April 22, 2014

new comments on old posts are pretty cool

My most popular post ever was one about how the 1st post of a spanking blog is often pretty cool, and why that's the case. If you haven't read it. the link is to your left, unless you're reading this in the mobile version, so here it is, just in case. Recently I was called out by a friend because I've been remiss in responding or replying to comments on my blog.  Guilty.

So I went through and tried to reply to several older comments, went through my "comments awaiting approval" folder and discovered that new comments on old posts are pretty cool.  For whatever reason, blogger is set up so that comments on older posts are marked as spam or as needing moderation before approval. Fair enough- I just hadn't checked those folders in awhile, and found some good stuff.

Some are sort of mundane. "Nice story." by anonymous in late 2013 on a post from early 2012. And I've dealt with old comments before- I posted something on problems with spanking social sites back in April 2012 that has had ongoing comments for over a year.  But I recently took another look at old comments and some are more fun.

  • An anonymous commentor* wrote about his red-headed wife who tried but is not into spanking. (post was from Jan. 2013, comment in Feb 2014)
  • An anonymous professor wrote about sorority girls visiting his office in a comment dated Aug. 2013 on a post from April 2012.
  • A couple of comments from Don't Clench (posted Sept 2012) dating up to more than a year later.

There are some I don't quite know how to respond to, like the anonymous comment on my post titled "vulnerability" from Sept. 2012. Someone (anonymous) posted something (kinda creepy) a month and a half later about taking off a woman's bra to make her feel vulnerable, and then someone commented, in June 2013 "JUST FUCK OFF & GO TO HELL, STUPID MOTHERFUCKERS !!!"  Really. okay... I guess it's not spam, since it didn't have a website at the end of the comment. If you take the time to type it, and I don't think it's spam, I'll okay it, even if I disagree.

Perhaps the most fascinating of the old comments I came across were those related to my interview of Betty Blaze. It was posted back in Dec. 2012.  Some anonymous commentor at the time wished I'd asked her about being spanked growing up. I didn't ask that because I think it's creepy to ask that, but I responded that I figured that had been asked and answered as a part of the punishment profiles for realspankings.com. More than a year later, I was more forthcoming about how I thought that question being asked of the spanking models was creepy. Within a couple of weeks, there was a comment on the old Betty Blaze interview: "No, Betty was not asked that question in her Punishment Profile. In fact, in the early punishment profile, they never asked if the girls were spanked growing up.
Please ask her."
I guess people really are interested in the (IMHO creepy) answers to that question, but on the other hand- they are actually paying attention to what I write.

Perhaps the best gem I discovered was a response to a post entitled "Another real life sorority spanking" from July 2013.  It was a story involving a sorority at NC State, and I included some pictures I found of NC State cheerleaders and sorority pledges.  Bless his heart, recently Charles Kret in Massachusetts read that entry and tried to post about five comments that he was willing to give or receive spankings to/from females in the area. Apparently he was frustrated by the need for moderation of comments on old posts, so he tried several times posting the same or similar comment. I decided I'd "publish" a couple of them. So if you're in Massachusetts and you're a female and into giving or receiving spankings please look up Charles Kret. I've looked for him on fetlife and would invite him to be my friend to help him out but no luck so far.

To all of you that are bloggers reading this, I ask you to take another look at your spam folders or comments to be moderated - you might find something amusing.

*Why does spell-check not accept "commentor" or "commentoer" but will accept "commentator" which I think of as a talking head on a news program?

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Omphaloskepsis

It's a fancy word for navel gazing. What is navel gazing? It's the activity of thinking too much or too deeply about yourself, your experiences, your feelings, etc... excessive introspection. I've been doing some navel gazing lately, both literally and figuratively.

Literally- not too long ago, I had my appendix removed. Through my navel.  See, they now take it out laparoscopically through tiny incisions in your navel and beneath the pubic hair line, so the tiny scars don't show. I've had better days than that day, obviously, but overall I can't complain too much about the experience. It wasn't a pleasant couple of days before it got bad enough that I searched symptoms on my phone and with a sinking feeling knew what was wrong.  The ER was surprisingly quick and relatively painless. The kinda cute female ER doc lifted up my gown and checked to make sure it wasn't torsion, but I wasn't in a state to enjoy it. Don't remember much after that. I was relieved I didn't say anything too inappropriate to the obviously gay nurse in my drugged-up state.  Some itchy bandages and walking around taking little steps like an old man for a week or so...  There were several follow up doctor visits which I'm convinced were just a chance for the doctors to get more insurance money- Sit in a waiting room 30-45 minutes, finally go back, lift up my shirt, poke around, "Yep, seem to be healing just fine!" $$ Ca - Ching!

Each time I was overly concerned about belly button lint. I'm a fairly hairy guy, and combine a hairy belly with a worn-out cotton undershirt and you get belly button lint. I made sure I cleared it before hand.

However I've done some serious figurative navel gazing even more recently. Not too long ago a great spanking romance author interviewed me, and I was somewhat surprised by the response.  Bless their hearts, there are a lot of ladies who read spanking romance novels. Most of the emails I get from this blog, since starting it, have been very supportive and affirming.  I've met a few ladies who wanted a spanking directly from responding to this blog. Many more emails have been from other "secret spankos" who are in a relationship with a vanilla spouse or significant other, and are relieved that they're not the only one out there like that. I love those, and that's part of why I decided to start this blog.

At the very top of this blog it says "There are eighty-bajillion spanking blogs out there, and 99% are written by someone who is "out" as a spanko, at the very least to their spouse/partner/significant other... this one is about someone who is not out but is a spanko in secret. For those who love their vanilla spouse/partner/significant other but still have that secret attraction to spanking... you're not alone."

Despite that masthead, of sorts, following the Natasha Knight interview I got a couple of emails from ladies who read spanking romance novels that said basically (paraphrasing here) "I really liked your blog and then I realized, OMG how could you do that to your wife?!!"

And so began quite a bit of self reflection/questioning/navel-gazing.  As I've said before, it's an issue I struggle with. I rationalize: different people are wired differently sexually. I'm turned on by spanking. Despite attempts, she's clearly not. I don't want to attempt to shove a square peg into a round hole. As one of these ladies pointed out, here are plenty of anecdotal examples of married men leaving their family because try as they might to maintain a facade, they're gay. Both she and I have seen second hand the pain that can cause. If I were stuck in prison, no amount of coercion or seduction or effort or pressure could cause me to be aroused at gay sex. It's just not the way I'm wired. Similarly, no amount of trying can get my wife aroused from spanking, and I certainly won't force it.  So I seek outlets, and part of that is writing this blog where folks similarly situated can know that they're not alone, even if they're reticent about making their presence known on the internet.

So I'm not going to quit blogging, and I'm not going to cease spanking women who want to be spanked (even/especially women married to a vanilla spouse).  Yes, it's risky, but I'm a grown man and like to think I know what I'm doing.

If you've made it this far, you deserve some sexy pictures of belly buttons, right? As a spanko, all too often the belly button is hidden from view.


mine looks more like this:
okay, so maybe not... missing hair and an appendectomy scar!

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

in search of my titanium skin

I've written a very few spanking stories, but I found both the act of writing them and the feedback really enjoyable.  However, there are some very good authors that I know read my blog occasionally, and I'm almost hesitant to delve into a post about the theory of writing spanking fiction because I'm hardly qualified.

But I'm having trouble... See, I've had this story idea/fantasy percolating in my head for awhile about a law firm with lots of spankings and sex. Think LA Law but with spankings.  Almost sort of a soap opera type fictional environment with interactions among characters that could change with each chapter/episode rather than just a short story with a beginning, a conflict, a climax, and conclusion.  I've even hammered out a few chapters and have the outlines for more in my head.  It's the set-up I can't quite figure out.  Almost all spanking stories require some suspension of disbelief, and I get that, but I'd like to try and make it at least plausible.  Sure, there are stories about people in spanking relationships that don't require a plausibility set-up. There are stories that take the time to build up to a spanking.  But creating a fantasy fictional world with lots of spankings... it's pretty tough to do.  Of course, these type stories probably appeal more to the hard-core spanko than the curious newbie: sort of like the difference between someone that goes to see a StarTrek movie vs. someone who goes to a convention.  

Awhile back Rollin Hand wrote a couple of essays about plausibility in spanking stories, and did a much better job than I could do at explaining the particular challenges in making a spanking story plausible.

Me, I'm not trying to attain his level of plausibility.  I'd say he comes closer to striving for realism. I'm not looking to write a story that could happen; I'm looking to write a story that might could maybe happen if the reader is willing to take a leap and enter a crazy fantasy world. Still though, you need something to set up the situation so that the reader can take that leap without just dismissing the setting as completely crazy, ridiculous, and outlandish.

Something like... the titanium armor on the space shuttle in the movie Armageddon.  Remember all those asteroid movies several years ago? In this one Bruce Willis and Ben Affleck went up in a space shuttle to blow up the asteroid headed for earth. But wait a minute- the space shuttles were extremely fragile, right? Cold weather caused one of the rings in the rocket booster to crack, some missing tiles caused another to burn up upon re-entry, right? How could we plausibly use a space shuttle to carry a nuclear weapon to land on a runaway asteroid? No, these weren't regular space shuttles... they were special top secret shuttles with titanium armor. Oh. Okay. Disbelief suspended. (Never mind that titanium armor would make the shuttle so heavy that it couldn't launch- I read that in an article somewhere but couldn't find it just now.)

I've read some fun spanking stories with some doozies of a set up. A modern woman thrust into a medieval world where women are spanked all the time...hmm... she's a scientist aboard a spaceship observing a colony of humans that decided to forgo technology and is stuck in a culture of ancient earth.  Just recently there was a discussion on the spanking library forum about creating a fictional world/setting where different authors could write stories. What if it were an island, stuck back in time? How does one explain the different culture allowing spankings? What if the swirling currents surrounding it kept out visitors by ship for centuries? The swirling currents surrounding this made up island have nothing to do with spanking, but are that "titanium armor" allowing the reader to suspend disbelief that such a culture could exist.  

So that's where I'm stuck on this series of stories in a spanking law firm. Still working on finding my titanium skin to help set it up.

Okay so maybe not what you were thinking when you saw the title of this post, huh?


Monday, March 10, 2014

Justice

The Texas judge who beat his daughter lost in the Republican primary last week. 

Background: Back in 2004 a teenage girl who had illegally downloaded files from the internet secretly recorded her dad taking a belt to her for having done so.  She posted the (warning- not for the sensitive) video of it on youtube in 2012, where it went viral, and to date has almost eight million views. She was interviewed on CNN, the Today show, etc... 

The video is horrifying to watch. It brought flashbacks to me, which I wrote about as a newbie blogger back when I thought no one was reading my fresh new spanking blog. Those flashbacks are echoed in some of the first comments on the Reddit story about him losing the primary: "I am 46 years old, watched the video and suddenly became 10 again...my mom did that sort of shit to me. It does stay with you forever."
and in the Reddit "Ask Me Anything" (a/k/a "AMA") of the daughter who posted the video "The last whipping I got was at age 14, when my father suspected I had been holding hands with a boy on the way back from a ski trip. Shirt pulled up to my neck, pants down to my ankles, and a leather belt applied with great force over a 15 minute period of time. Welts which turned into bruises forced me to hide in a corner while dressing after gym class. My childhood was filled with all of the things that affected you. My dad was a preacher, and in my understanding had all of the control of my environment that your father did."

These flashbacks of abuse made me wonder, at the time I first posted, and to some extent still today... "Wait a minute... I like spankings. I get a sexual thrill from them.  Am I all fucked up and sick because of it? Did I become obsessed with spankings because I got them?" That video is the very definition of Sqwicky for me.

Admittedly, at the dawn of the internet, most of the stories about spankings involved childhood spankings. I read them. I liked them.  I think most spankos were exposed to spankings initially in childhood.  I've come to understand though, that for every spanko like me that got spanked, and is worried that they're sick and twisted because of childhood spankings, there's another who worries that they're interested in it because they never got spanked and thinks they're subconsciously seeking the love and affection and firm support they never got growing up.  I think I've learned enough in the last few years of talking to fellow spankos that I can now say comfortably that I am confident that a desire for spanking, or to be spanked, has nothing to do with whether or not one was spanked growing up.

A couple of additional thoughts:
1) I really admire Michael Masterston, the owner and founder of the realspankings.com family of spanking sites. He opens up here about growing up in Texas and his fascination with spanking.  I've written before about the evolution of a spanko, and how for a long time I was just a consumer of stories and videos. I think he's someone who has mastered the consumerism among spankos, and that maybe his voice is lost in the spanking community because he's opening himself up, but only to those who subscribe to his website. Again, I'm a big fan of his work, and admit that I subscribed to his website months and months and months at a time even way back when I didn't always have reliable access to the internet because they were pioneers in spanking video and I wanted to support that company.  All that having been said, I'd like to issue him a challenge, and I don't have an open communications channel to do so... Every new model for that site he asks if they were spanked growing up, and then asks details about it.  I'd challenge him, in light of this post and the truths behind it, to stop asking that question of his new models.  

2)County Court at Law judges are a unique breed.  The quintessential big-fish-in-a-small-pond.  Texas elects all state and county judges.  I looked it up and couldn't find reliable data on this, but in my experience it's really rare for a sitting CCL judge to lose in the primary.  I haven't had a hearing in front of a CCL judge in years, though as we attempt to streamline the justice system. CCL judges may likely take a more prominent role in the years to come.  Still, it should be pretty embarrassing for a multi-term CCL judge to lose at the primary level, when there's not even a Democrat running for it. Certain counties vote certain ways... no Republican is going to get elected to the judiciary in Dallas or Harris county, and no Democrat candidate is going to get elected in the county in which he was running.  By the way, I looked up Judge William Adams, and there's no disciplinary actions against him on the state bar website.  

Monday, March 3, 2014

howdy y'all

No, this isn't a post about cowboy spankings, in spite of the title. Just me saying hi, because I haven't in awhile. Yes, I might really say "howdy y'all' when coming upon a group of old friends. So I'm just explaining because somewhat surprisingly I've seen a jump the blog statistics from those of you across the pond. (and I'm hoping it's not just spam.)

Not really inspired to post something by anything spanking related in my life lately, but I felt like I should, because it's been awhile.  Yes, in case you were wondering, the puppy dog eyes post was inspired by a fairly recent real spanking.  Since my last post there's been a recent "controversy" over a State Senator's bill in Kansas to allow more severe spankings in schools. To anyone who follows politics, a crazy idea submitted as a proposed bill by some state Senator somewhere is hardly news. As expected though, the leading "thought leader" internet magazine is all over it.  Really now, what else is new?

Really, the biggest news spanking wise, for me lately, is that I discovered the spanking library is now accessible on iphones and ipads! Woo-Hoo! There're ~20,000 stories collected from the internet in an archive that's searchable.  I've always thought it was a worthwhile cause- I've always had an interest in spanking but really got into it first through stories on the internet. Yet it has been largely inaccessible to me until they embraced apple products.  Couldn't even read it on the Chrome app for ipad until recently.
It's still a bit quirky in navigation- you cannot open more than one window (or one story) at a time, but I think that's largely because they're trying to protect stories from being copied and pasted into different formats. You can add multiple stories to your reading list so you can find them again (but be careful not to click on the description twice or it will accidentally remove them from your reading list.) Definitely not perfect- it logs me out when I try to click on the "next" button for the next chapter in a serial, can't see comments after the story, etc... but it's a huge benefit to be able to read the stories at all. Not only that but there are really good stories, including some that have been published, and some from some (Ahem) amateur authors that have only written a couple of short stories.

And what's a good post celebrating new spanking stories access without some great spanking library illustrations, courtesy of an accomplished author (a/k/a DJ Black) who has many stories on my reading list on the spanking library right now?