Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Ahhh... Spring. Time for tan lines!

Early spring... when daffodils start to come up even before the tulips.  When everyone is still mostly sticking to their New Years resolutions, and even some that haven't are trying to give up bad habits for Lent.  Green shoots.  Eating healthy.  Cleaning out the garage because you want to help the wife with spring cleaning, and besides, it's such a dead period in sports.  I think there's something natural in trying to do better with a fresh year.  (I know, it's still technically winter, but especially this year it sure feels like spring.)

It takes me back to college, and how at this time of year everyone was still in their "I'm going to class and not going out so much and am going to do better this semester!" mode.  Folks started jogging and working out.  Back in college though, there was no element of self-improvement or getting in shape to eliminate being in bad shape or religious self-sacrifice involved... No, it was all about preparing for spring break!  Woo-Hoo!

Me, I was cynical- I figured I could go out more now because there would be plenty of time to get serious about the semester later, and I usually had more money at the beginning of the semester than at the end, so at this time I'd indulge in eating steak and buying nice beer instead of Keystone light.  I was just a rebel... going against the flow.  Despite one ill-advised RV rental and road trip to Florida, I didn't get into the Spring Break craziness, much less the preparation, as much as most.  I still remember the fraternity brother who added a couple of shots of whiskey to his protein shake as his party drink at this time of year. And back in the day, lots of folks were trying to get tan.   Which leads me into this post.  Whiskey's not healthy for you.  Neither is steak, and neither is tanning.  But I like whiskey, I like steak, and I sure do like tan lines.

So maybe it's not exactly   an   original   blog   topic.  But I saw the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition in the check out line of the convenience store today, and I was inspired.  I'm a fan of tan lines on a bottom about to be spanked.  Somehow it emphasizes the bottom and makes it seem more intimate and more vulnerable- you're getting to see something that most people don't.  Plus it shows off the pink of a spanking so well!

from dallasspankshard.com






Tan lines for guys too, I guess.
It's hard to talk about spanking and tan lines and not mention Dallas.  I've subscribed to his site a number of times over the years, but his style just isn't my favorite.  I'll say this though... so many of his videos feature ladies with exceptional tan lines.  Apparently,  he asks his models to work on their tan lines ahead of time. Several small pics I found on his website...
And no discussion of spanking and tan lines would be complete without saying something about Tiki.  She's a former girlfriend of Dallas and back when I first saw his videos, they were almost all of her.  Yes, the cut of that bikini probably dates these images, but she had incredible tan lines, and is probably one of the reasons why I like them so much. (all of these images copyright dallasspankhard.com)


Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Breast Spanking- an acquired taste + original "artwork"

A Robin's breasts are red*

At the risk of turning off a whole bunch of readers, I thought I'd talk about spanking breasts.  I mean, pussy spanking- that's a topic that's been covered in blogs before.  But breast spanking? I imagine all my female readers clutching their chests in horror.  I don't think there's anyone that grew up envisioning and fantasizing about breasts being spanked, like they might have about being spanked on their bottom.  It is an acquired taste- no doubt about it.  But I've acquired the taste, and that story is below.  Meanwhile, to the anonymous spanking blogger friend that inspired this post... I'm winking at you, even if you can't acknowledge it. 

While quite common among the BDSM crowd, I gather... breast spanking is relatively rare on commercial spanking video sites. I'm guessing it's relatively rare as a practice among couples engaged in spanking too.  I still remember a video called "Spanks for the Mammaries" from awhile back, but couldn't find it on my hard drive.  Recently Pandora Blake filmed a long scene including a bit where she was caned on her breasts. (bet that hurt!)
There was once scene I remember from realspankings.com where the very busty "Lori" was spanked on her breasts with a number of implements.  I remember it well, and could not finish watching it- just too severe for my tastes, and I deleted it. (This is the only pic I could find of that scene from a google image search.)

So here's how I grew to appreciate breast spankings; how I acquired my taste for it.  Early in my phase of meeting ladies from internet sites for real play, I started talking to one lady who had recently split with her disciplinarian.  She'd mentioned several times about being punished on her body, not just a spanking on her bottom.  I think her old disciplinarian used a flogger of some sort.  That wasn't really my thing, but she was good looking, and wanted to play, so... who was I to complain?  I've mentioned before on this blog that different people want different things from spanking, and she was very much into real discipline for real events.  I talked to her about what she was feeling guilty about, and this was the focus of our sessions.  The second time we met, she talked about feeling guilty for being sharp with and not more understanding of one her friends who was going through breast cancer treatment, and she felt guilty for being inwardly resentful of having to help her out.  Now, I'll be perfectly honest- I'm no psychologist, and I'm not really comfortable taking on the role of a real disciplinarian for real offenses, especially when some of those offenses are just in your head.  I'm far more comfortable with light-hearted play.  But... I remembered what she'd said earlier about her former disciplinarian punishing her whole body, not just her bottom, and I really did not like some of the things she was saying.  Suddenly...bingo! the light bulb went off in my head.  

"Well, I can think of a way to help you remember what your friend is going through.  I can't think of a better punishment to fit the crime.  You have an idea what's coming to you, don't you?"

"Yes Sir."

"Get your top off."  

"Yes Sir."

But then... How does one spank breasts?  Standing up with arms behind her head is the only way I'd seen before, but I wasn't really wild about it.  On the fly, I came up with the perfect position.  I could not find any picture like it for this blog post, so I composed this MSPaint rendition of our new spanking position:

Okay, so I'm no artist.  On the other hand, I'm pretty good at pictionary and I think this drawing conveys the position accurately, even if it's not a great picture.  My hair is not that long, I actually have 5 fingers, and that's supposed to be a little pink on her breast, not a bunch of pimples, but you get the idea...  Her head was on a couple of pillows, and her chest was across my lap.  Her statements about how she acted toward her friend genuinely irritated me.  I told her how nice her breasts were, and how her friend would be jealous of hers, and how this probably hurt less than what her co-worker was going through.  I tried my best to push her buttons, and her eyes welled up with tears.  I was worried that I was being an asshole, but she'd said she wanted it intense, and I knew I was basically auditioning for the role of her disciplinarian (even though I didn't really know what I was doing).  It was one of the more memorable sessions I've had, and she really seemed to have gotten something out of it, based on the hugs and tears and conversation afterwards. 

Breast spanking has some advantages over bottom spanking... if anything, it's MORE intimate.  You can look into her eyes and see the ouchy faces, and tell her to look at you in the eyes, which is difficult.  The temptation to cover up is even more pronounced, because covering your breasts with your hands is easier than covering one's bottom.  Breasts are round, and soft, and fun to play with and fondle like a bottom, but even more sensitive. She wound up seeing someone else as a disciplinarian that was "more strict and firm"  than I was (and unlike me- was older than she was) and didn't joke around as much.  Fair enough... I'm slow to anger and far more friendly, playful, and jokey than strict and firm most of the time.  On the other hand, once I'm irritated at genuinely bad behavior, I can be unyielding and creatively, well... sadistic. This was one of those times.

I tried the breast spanking thing on another lady I saw a few times for spanking, and she said it hurt pretty bad but was a huge turn on- almost too much of a turn on (because it was supposed to be non-sexual) and she wasn't comfortable with it.  We only tried it once.  She has a live in boyfriend that spanks her now.  I've also instructed my lunchtime fellow secret spanko buddy in spanking her breasts on several occasions. (Hey, it's long distance, and we have to occasionally spice it up somehow, right?)

Anyway- Have you ever tried breast spanking? Any desire to have that done or just general revulsion toward it?  I'm curious.

*Yeah, Yeah, I know, it's a male robin who has red breasts... still thought it was a good illustration.

Review of Spanking Sarah

Do blowjobs go well with spankings?  Sometimes.  I've been sitting on this post for awhile, mostly because I couldn't decide whether to post the pics that really illustrate the unique nature of this site. I decided against it, but probably the most obvious difference between Spanking Sarah and so many other websites is that it's far more sexual than any other.  (Well, almost any other.)  But that's not the only thing that sets it apart.  There are so many interesting and unusual aspects to this site that it's a task to try and organize them into something coherent.

Introduction
When I decided to do a few spanking website reviews, I decided that I wanted to focus on smaller websites that might benefit from the exposure, and deliver the review from a consumer's point of view without trying to kiss the ass of the people behind the website.  Spanking Sarah is a perfect candidate for one of my reviews.  (Not to be confused with that other spanking site produced by a different Sarah).

I'd never heard of it before Sarah posted a comment on my blog about how she went through the video sharing boards to prevent file-sharing.  I have no idea where or how she found my blog post, and it was one of my earlier comments, but I appreciated her viewpoint.  Her site is produced in Britain, and I don't think advertises much, because- like I said- I'd never heard of it.

Looks like they're having real fun
I really like this site.  Let me make that clear up front, because I'm going to poke some fun at them too.  It's obvious that the performers are having a good time, and I bet it's a fun place to work (and not just for the guys getting blowjobs).  That having been said... I don't think I've ever laughed as much watching the videos from one site before, and often I suspect the comedy was unintentional.  There are many candid unscripted scenes, in addition to costumed and seemingly scripted ones.  There are a few long-running story lines, and some intense scenes, but some... well, (unintentional laughter moment #1) if I call it amateurish that sounds like a criticism, but I think it's really appealing when the cast breaks character and starts giggling, trying to get back in character.  Maybe most studios would edit that out and insert it as an outtake later, but it's different, and I kind of liked it.    

A typical spanking model
Another thing I liked are the variety of spanking models.  There are about three videos with Pandora Blake from what looks like a few years ago, but other than that I've never heard of any of the actors/models appearing in any of the videos.  There are some typical spanking models, but there are also several older ladies getting spanked too.  Somehow that makes it seem more real.

NOT a typical spanking model, but those look nice bouncing after impact!
Have I mentioned that the videos are sexy?
No doubt about it, the videos on this site are usually very sexual.  About 10-20% of them show actual blowjobs, and in a few cases, intercourse.  And let me tell you , the actors engaged in this are not necessarily typical model types, but regular people.  Again, I kind of enjoyed this aspect.
this is about all I felt comfortable showing on my blog.

Even though less than a quarter of the videos show explicit hard-core sex, almost all the videos are much more sexual than you'll find on almost any other spanking site.  There's a lot of fondling and licking going on, a few dildos here and there, lots of breast grabbing, and  in one scene the spanker was summoned from her bath (complete with plenty of sexy shots of her bathing) to get dressed and deliver some discipline.  Some have whined and moaned about the spanking video "money shot" where the camera gets down low and directly behind the female spankee, showing all her naughty bits.  Actually, I kind of enjoy this, and almost every scene has some nice spread-legged, up-close-and-very-personal shots. This is so prevalent that it led to unintentional laughter moment #2, when the lady getting spanked is told to spread her legs, and you know right what the cameraman is about to do, and then he does it- gets down low and zooms right in.  Again, I hate to admit it, but I liked this.  Frankly, watching spanking videos is a big sexual turn-on for me, and the almost blatant sexuality of the parties involved in these shoots is a little refreshing.

However, most of the cum-shots are accompanied by super cheesy music and shown in slow motion, which sort of ruined the erotic appeal and led to unintentional laughter moment #3. In fact, several of the videos state that they were produced by "Remington Steel" and this is sort of appropriate, because much of the music can best be described as 80's-TV-show-theme-song-ish.  There are a few other ill-advised musical additions, like when a nun is giving a spanking and near the finale of the spanking you start to hear the Hallelujah Chorus.

More about Sarah
Sarah apparently runs the site, and appears in probably 90% of the videos.  Sometimes she's the spanker, and sometimes she's the one getting it.  Often she's in both roles in the same video.  She has a distinctive look and thick British accent.  She's very tall, has incredibly long legs, and is not shy at all about sharing her body with her viewers!  She looks like she could be your teacher, your aunt, or someone that works in your office, not a professional spanking website star.  Sort of the lady next door (or what I envision the lady next door would look like if I lived in the English countryside, maybe).  Somehow she appears more normal and authentic than the fantasy depicted on many spanking websites, and again, that appealed to me.


the cameraman's about to move to his left, you can just sense it
Details
Billing is through CCBill, and is $30/month- a little pricey, and updates can be a bit irregular.  There is a TON (or is it a tonne?) of content, though.  All the movies are in one or two parts (not counting a few ongoing series) and range from 90-400 meg or so.  I do like that the updates aren't in tiny chunks of the movie, though.  If I had a quibble, it is that the excellent movie descriptions found on the preview page before you log in are not available on the download page- just a small thumbnail and movie title. The picture sets are on a separate page as well, so you have to do some looking to decide if you want to download each movie.  There's also no way to search movies based by particular performer like you'll find on many sites, though there is a page highlighting some of the models.
Conclusion
This is a unique site, and may not be for everyone (especially if you don't like your spanking movies extra-sexy and/or prefer only Hollywood starlet type models).  However, I thoroughly enjoyed it, and highly recommend it.

Friday, February 17, 2012

I knew I was a spanko when...

...when I realized that my middle school fantasies about one of the hottest girls in our school (who just so happened to live down the street) were not the normal middle school boy fantasies about a hot girl.  No, my fantasy was probably a lot more detailed.  

A bit of background- this girl was very pretty, and developed early, but she was also a "bad" girl.  I heard stories about how she had gone to the skating rink with high school guys.  (gasp!)  A lot of people in the school talked about her.  I talked to her, and rode bikes and played baseball and football with her little brother, but she was definitely above me in social standing.  We were both in the crappiest neighborhood that fed into the good middle school.  We talked during the summer, but she ignored me at school.  We were secret friends in middle school, but drifted even further apart in high school.  Had no idea what ever happened to her, until a couple of years ago when everyone was discovering facebook for the first time.  Still pretty; married a minor league baseball player.  

Anyway, back to my fantasy... It was that she got caught for something bad and was going to get sent for "licks" from the vice principal the next day, and she was scared.  (This was a real possibility in my middle school.)  She came to me and I comforted her, telling her it would be okay, but then just to see if she could take it, she asked me to paddle her.  Practice, you see.  At some point she took her jeans and then panties down, and that was about where the fantasy ended because, well... I was ready to fall asleep.  I realized at the time that my fantasy was not normal, and that I had a sick fascination with spanking.

There were other moments before and after... still remember spending the night in early elementary school with a friend and hearing his sister get a spanking; still remember sneaking one of my mom's trashy "bodice-ripper" novels into my room and reading one scene over and over again until I was, well, ready to fall asleep.   (I've always been a voracious reader and a night owl, even before the internet existed.) Then there was that discovery of the Penthouse Variations magazines with stories and spanking pictorials that really sent me over the edge.  Truthfully though, it was the realization following that fantasy about the hot girl down the street that made me realize I was really into spanking, and although I knew it wasn't normal, I was okay with it because I enjoyed thinking about it so much.

On a related note, it appears that the SpankoAbInitio blog is at least taking an extended break, and that make me sad.  That blog was all about early thoughts about spanking, and tracing the interest in it back to childhood memories.  ("Ab Initio" means "from the beginning" in case you wondered.)  I thought it was an exceptionally strong theme, but was worried that he would quickly run out of blog post topics, with such a narrow focus, and it appears he has. There's a finite amount of posts one can make on that topic- heck I just detailed most of mine in one post.  But I do find these early recollections fascinating of different people that are into spanking.

If you're reading this, SpankoAbInitio- take courage, and please keep going.  For the rest of you, I was pleasantly surprised (maybe shocked is more descriptive) to the response my First Posts are cool topic got, and I think it would be equally entertaining for folks to write about when they realized that they had an abnormal/unnatural affection for spanking.  This isn't nearly as original, because I've read several blog posts about this very same topic, but for those of you that haven't- let's hear it.  When did you realize you were a spanko?

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Secret Spanko Tip -downloading spankingtube (and other) vids

Just in case you have let's say a favorite spankingtube clip and want to download it to enjoy again and again... 



There's an easy way to do it.  Look up "video download helper" on Firefox, and add it as an extension


Once you do so, there will be a little button on the toolbar that will appear to rotate whenever you can download something on a webpage.

If you click it, there will be a menu and you can download the movie, although it's only playable in as a .VLC media file.  The file name will be something like filename.flv  and will look something like this once you download it:
You can download that media player here -it's a very small program and can play virtually any media, including quicktime (.mov) movies (and it's also good for otherwise unplayable incomplete downloaded .wmv files.)

This technique is a little tricky, and you often have to rename videos, as the default name is something incomprehensible.  Just click on the logo, then click on "quick download" and Boom! there you go. However, this handy little tool is also useful for downloading other embedded video files, like those on youtube or those contained in (ahem) blogs, or even certain premium sites that do not allow downloads, just playback of movies cough, cough, Spankingcourt, cough... 


Okay, fine... maybe that was a double secret spanko tip for those of you that have read this far.  I'm walking a fine line here... from all that I've heard the folks that run Spankingcourt are good people, and I like the concept.  I really like some people that have appeared in their videos (obviously).  I can even understand them not wanting to have to deal with pirated videos, hence, their "you can play our videos while you membership is active, but you can't download them." stance.  But it's a disservice to consumers, and not the industry standard.  They're not the only ones, by the way, just the most recent studio like this that I have subscribed to.  

Some special disdain is reserved for Shadow Lane in this area.  Years ago I purchased (I thought) a movie from them, only to find out that after 30 days the movie that I downloaded was no longer playable.  I sort of got it, I mean, that was basically the successful model of Blockbuster at the time... But it pissed me off so much that I ordered the same movie again (it was a therapist and patient movie, I forget the title) just so I could figure out a way to save it and play it again.  I failed, though.  I still rented several from Shadow Lane  even after that just because their content was so good, but part of me was pissed off every time I did so. Still haven't figured that out, and hate to pay a super-premium for clips4$ale movies from big time studios, but what can you do?

Edit to add, just for clarification... I'm by no means advocating stealing of anything.  I'm merely offering a suggestion so one can access, file, and replay content that is either A) provided for free on blogs and spanking tube, or B) that you've already paid for... to your heart's uhm, content.  Hence- no stealing involved. Anyway, enjoy your movies, all you secret spankos out there.  

Coming soon... posts on early spanko thoughts, breast spanking, deep thoughts on both the origin and future of spankos, a fishing report, and some more website reviews, in no particular order.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

My first spanking video

Enjoy this video of me getting spanked by Dana Kane.  I was waiting for her to post it on her blog first, since she did all the work.  But since she has a different (and much larger) audience I figured it wouldn't hurt to post it here too.  Several thoughts on it below.



  • She has an amazing screen presence.  We talked about it for MAYBE a couple of minutes, and once the camera started recording she just talked to it like this was all well rehearsed and scripted.  Note her lack of any verbal crutches.  
  • My arms look skinny and my butt looks big, but I'm sure it's just perspective, right?. (Plus she really is petite.)
  • I've seen myself on camera before, and it never ceases to amaze me how much I can't stand hearing my own  voice recorded, even if I don't talk a lot in the video.  I think that's the same reaction most people have to hearing their own voice, though.  
  • As I've said before, I don't want to blog about every spanking experience I have.  Partly this is for privacy- both mine and my playmates, but also because it ebbs and flows, and I don't want folks thinking either a) I'm a spanking slut or b) how come he blogs so much and never actually spanks anyone or gets spanked?  But , well, we did make a video and all.
  • The rest of this spanking was probably the least severe I've had from Dana.  Mostly because we were so busy having a great conversation while I was over her lap.  Seriously.  She's got a wealth of knowledge and experience, and I enjoy talking to her.  She inspired at least a couple of upcoming blog posts.
  • I do mark very easily, but even after the whole spanking was over- there were no marks by the end of the day, yet still I was sore and tender the next day.  Amazing.
Anyway... enjoy.

Bet an arrow in your bottom hurts even more than a caning or paddling!


Happy Valentine's Day! The bushmen in the Kalahari dessert in southern Africa put those brutal eastern European studios to shame when it comes to inflicting pain on a woman's buttocks.  I think of it every time I see a cupid cartoon though.  This post is only relating to spanking in the most tangential way.  I mean, I guess it involves a man inflicting pain to a woman's bottom, and there's romantic feelings involved... but it's definitely not spanking.


These bushmen (the ones that speak in clicks) are kinda crazy have a very unique way of proposing marriage.  Their traditional courtship culminates in the man choosing his mate by shooting her in the butt with a special love arrow shot from a love bow that's a miniature version of their hunting bows.   

Think I'm making this up? Here's an item available for sale here from someone's private collection of African art.


I learned about this as a child, and it's uhm... "stuck" with me ever since.. I was fairly normal little kid (I like to think) but when I wasn't playing outside or with my star wars figures I read a lot.  Our family had a very old set of World Book encyclopedias we acquired from the church when they got a new set for the church library.  I think ours was a late 50's or early 60's edition... And I would read it.  (Okay, so maybe that's not normal.)  One article I read several times described this symbolic yet savage practice of the primitive natives in terms that were definitely not politically correct, even describing how those women stored fat in their buttocks as a sign of wealth and health, so it didn't really injure them. "Merely a flesh wound" you see. 

I just did some quick internet searches and somewhat surprisingly, could not find much about it (at least on the 1st page of a google search).  I did find just enough, though, to confirm that I hadn't somehow made it up and it is (or was) a real practice.  There's the entry in the items for sale linked above, and I found this account of an explorer/tourist who tried to participate in such a ritual a few years ago.  On the one hand, it's an eyewitness account and makes it seem very much more symbolic and less brutal than one might imagine.  On the other hand, I'm sort of appalled at this guy's cavalier attitude such that he would try to hit one of the tribal women (which is an invitation to marriage in that culture) without a lot of thought about the consequences for her if he had hit her and then just went home.  There are some pics on the link that I'm betting are not exactly 2257 compliant. 

Anyway, like I said... not spanking related, but fascinating, maybe disturbing, and timely. (Bet you never look at a picture of cupid and his little quiver of love again the same!)

Oh yeah... There's a fun little clip I made with Dana Kane up on spankingtube just now.  Much more about this soon.


Saturday, February 11, 2012

In the Chross-hairs of the pageview cannon and 80's TV spanking memories

spanking enthusiasts won't get this, but spanking bloggers will.

Tom Landry famously admonished the Dallas Cowboys players not to celebrate when they scored a touchdown- to act like they'd been there before.  Good advice, generally, but not going to follow it tonight. 

First time I saw the Chross blog I thought it was a confusing mix of a gazillion links.  A lot of them were like spanking comic book scenes.  Ehhh... whatever.  Then I discovered that people paid it a lot of attention to his posts, and thought "who the hell is this guy that everyone thinks is the arbiter of spanking blog goodness?!" 

Then I heard more about him, and started to explore.  He has a database of spanking scenes from mainstream movies and TV shows.  That was cool, but I'd seen plenty before.  Did he have that scene from Fantasy Island I remember my family watching way back when, the one where I asked my parents why the man was spanking a grown-up?  My parents told me that they were just being silly on a TV show and quickly turned it off.  I'd actually searched for the scene before but could never find it.  He had it

However, I couldn't find either the Different Strokes or the Silver Spoons episodes about spanking that also fascinated me as a kid.  On the other hand, A) those were children spankings and probably not something he'd want to post and B) there was a lot of talk about spankings but I don't think there were actual spanking scenes shown.

Anyway, I quickly figured out just how powerful this blog was in the spanking blog world, and true-confession-time-here... I got a little jealous.  I'd see the spankings of the week posted and think "whatever! my stuff was better than some of that he linked to today!"

But I couldn't think of a better post of mine than the one about other blog's 1st posts to get "chrossed" and attain such widespread readership.  The basic idea was that there's some great blogging content out there that's never read, because spanking bloggers had pent up thoughts on spanking which led them to create a blog, but by the time they have a decent audience, only their most recent updates are read.  All that great stuff in the beginning is sadly ignored.  

So thank you, Chross.  I really appreciate it.  And I urge all my readers to pick a couple of their favorite blogs, and go to the archives and read the 1st month of posts.  Hopefully you'll enjoy it as much as I did.



Friday, February 10, 2012

1st posts are pretty cool


I got to thinking the other day about the first few blog posts one does, and was inspired to write about it.  Frankly, researching this post was a lot of fun.  I went back and started trying to find and then reading first posts of my favorite blogs, and then I had to read the next, and then the first month of posts too.  I intended to post this last week, but was having too much fun discovering a lot more about my favorite blogs and spent all my time absorbing instead of writing.  Many of these blogs have been around quite a while, and their posting style has evolved.  Blogging is fun, and when you're getting your feet wet, you naturally want to talk about it.  Now, I realized pretty quickly that blogging about blogging is an audience-killer.  You won't find some of the big blogs writing posts blogging about blogging today, but I found it comforting to know that not long after they started, sometimes they did.  And sometimes they still do, it's just in the form of an article instead of a blog post!

I found a lot of fascinating and insightful posts.  I won't link to them all, because I also found things that I'm not sure the authors want me to highlight.  Things like references to old aliases (let's face it no one in the spanking blog world uses their real name, but some of us change ours more frequently than others) and periods and yeast infections...  I think maybe before people have a big audience, they're more free to view blogging as an outlet, a place to vent and share their most honest thoughts anonymously.  

I think it's fascinating because, save for maybe a huge fan of some blog who takes the effort to read the whole thing, no one reads the earliest posts.  The author hasn't built up an audience yet, but they've probably been reading a lot and thinking a lot about what they might have to say if they created a blog.  Finally this builds up until the author pulls the trigger and starts their blog... and no one reads it.  Then slowly, a drip, drip, drip, trickle, trickle, and hopefully, eventually, if they stick with it, a flowing stream of readers will watch their blog, but by that time they're posting crap like Cornertime Sucks which is (true confession time here) basically I-found-a-cool-picture-and-I'll-write-a-paragraph-on-it-because-I-need-to-post-SOMETHING-while-I-finish-the-post-I-really-wanted-to-write.  It's sad really.  Some of the best, most heartfelt stuff is written before anyone linked to them.  Before they had any followers, or were mentioned on any other blogs.  By the time the blog does have followers and links, those following the links are usually looking at several blogs, and do well to keep up with a few, much less go back and read all of one.  So, fans of spanking blogs, I urge you, for your own good, to pick a couple of your favorites, and go back and look at the early stuff.  There's a ton of titillating, enlightening, insightful content that's largely hidden from view.  Buried treasure from the early aughts.

Other than my uhm, "research" for website reviews (more to come, er, more on the way) I enjoyed creating this post more than any other.  A few more thoughts on 1st/early posts... I found that first posts are generally divided into two categories...

1) Many first posts are an introduction of what is to come.  This is informative, but kinda boring.  I really enjoy Rollin's writing on DisciplinaryTales, and his first post is an example of the here's-what you're-about-to-get model for first posts.  This is more frequent for blogs that have a strong theme, or concept, and are more than just... "I want to talk about me, and spanking, and my involvement with spanking."

2) Other first posts (probably most) are more of a personal introduction.  Though I really like theme blogs, these first posts are more fun to read, honestly.  Pandora's first post is a good example.  It serves as a great introduction of her and what she hopes to write about. (and it's also from 2006!)

But we can go back even further than that- Here's Bonnie's 1st post from about a year before (2005!)- It got a whopping two comments, but has the pic that she uses as her avatar in it. (and in the large version it's pretty cute!)

I guess the 3rd category would be blogs whose 1st posts don't really count because they weren't really the first blog post, just the 1st one I could find.  Pink's had like 5 blogs and moved from one to the other.  Erica spent her 1st post bitching about what MySpace did to her old blog, and I could not find Chross's 1st post, though the last one I could find in his archives says something about "here are some cool pics I haven't posted in awhile" and was from back in 2010 so I know that wasn't his first.  

By the way, another little surprise I found... kudos to Alex in Spankingland.  When I was researching this, I totally figured she'd been at this blogging thing for quite awhile.  Nope- She started just before I did, but her 1st month was full of great content

In my 1st post, I guess I tried to both introduce myself and talk about what I thought would be the theme of the blog.  Again, I highly encourage my audience to take a look at the early work of their favorite bloggers. I think you'll enjoy it.

P.S.  I added a new blog to my blog roll.  It's called Spanking View and it's by the cameraman that works for Clare Fonda.  Thanks to TimtheTurn I learned of it.  By the way, his (the cameraman's... not Tim's) first post was about doing spanking model paperwork.  I'm fascinated by behind-the-scenes stuff from the spanking industry, and it was especially interesting to me, because I just filled out some such paperwork myself this week.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Cornertime sucks

I'll be honest- I think cornertime is a waste of time.  As a secret spanko, my time with a spankee is precious.  I don't want to waste it with her standing in the corner.  No matter how cute her red bottom is.  If there's some scolding needed, I think it's best delivered as she's over my knee and I can punctuate the lecture with some well-placed smacks. The bent over my knee is just about as vulnerable position as she can be in, and the answers are probably more meaningful as she's in the middle of a spanking than they would be as she's through with a spanking and just standing in the corner with her red bottom on display.  To be honest, in my handful of spanking sessions I've used cornertime twice.  Once was when I was going into the other room to get a different implement and once was when I literally went to the kitchen for a glass of water.  
 These pics are plenty hot, but in general, I say cornertime... Boo!

OTK lecturing yeah!!

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Scheduling Sportscenter on the Lifetime Network... Brady, Manning, and how "alpha male" is relative.

Not gonna lie... It's been a frustrating week as far as writing for my spanking blog goes.  A couple of posts I thought were comedic gold (at least I was chuckling while I composed them) were greeted with... the sound of crickets chirping.  At least it hasn't been cold enough to kill the crickets so they can still chirp.  I've been mentioned a few times on other blogs lately, but it hasn't affected the number of people who read my blog a bit.

As I was whining/bitching about this privately to a friend, and talking it through in my head, I mentioned the fact that the spanking blog world is dominated by female spanking blog writers, and maybe trying to write my way was just sort of like trying to broadcast Sportscenter on the Lifetime Network... she agreed that male spanking bloggers have a tougher time gaining a readership.  I wondered if Secret Spanko was just doomed to failure.

Fuck it.  I won't give up without a fight.  Even if males are supposedly struggling in general with the new economy on a profound scale (and that's a real live journalist essay not a spanking blogger post).

So here's a couple of heartfelt Lifetime Network moments, meant to make the female readers go "awww..." and gain at least some sympathy comments!

Frustrations in the spanking blogging world are NOTHING compared to real life frustrations. For real!   This weekend we simultaneously took our baby crib to the storage shed, cleared out the closets and helped my grandmother into their "new apartment" (aka assisted living facility).  The hardest part, honestly, was going through the baby shoes.  Even though I'm about to get a snippy-snip-snip, and we both agree that's for the best... seeing those little bitty shoes makes it tough. I just about teared up as we boxed them up to give away or donate.

But I'm not just leaving the Sportscenter-on-the-Lifetime-Network as an idea... just tailoring my writing to the female crowd- NO! I'll go with this topic and discuss it too... see, married women would prefer to have an affair with Eli Manning than Tom Brady.  Wow!  I mean, Tom Brady's the quintessential alpha male... He has a butt chin, gorgeous jaw-line and locks, endorsement contracts out the wazoo, multi-million dollar supermodel girlfriend, stands tall in the pocket... He's the Man!

So smug
can't you just small the cologne?!






she's even hotter than my last girlfriend

But wait... the slow-talking, more cute than hot guy who has played second fiddle to his brother for a decade now Eli Manning ranks higher in the number of attached ladies that would like to, uhm... get to know him?!  Kinda crazy, but kinda understandable.  After all, Eli. might not be the alpha in his family, but studies show that birth order is not nearly as applicable as one might think once the child is out on his/her own and not directly connected to the family.  Plus Eli's a champion in his own right.  If he were to walk into any bar or grocery store, he's by gosh an NFL champion quarterback, and it seems silly to think of him in a beta male kind of way.  I pretty much guarantee you he could whip the ass of me and any "alpha-male" referred to as the head of the household of any and every domestic discipline blog... I think it's funny how he's considered a beta male in the news media.
Brady: I'll kick your ass.  Manning: Huh?!

There've not been many Super Bowls that I cared less about recently- I dislike both teams; but then I thought of Eli, and how he doesn't get enough respect... I'm no NFL quarterback, and I don't have a multi-million dollar contract, but I sympathize with Eli.  I'm glad the Giants won. (Even though it was a travesty that Parcells didn't make it into the HOF, but I guess that's another post.) I sympathize in part with Eli because I have a "baby face" and because I've been accused of being a "beta male" (because I've switched) when in the vast majority of circumstances I'm more of an alpha than all but maybe baby-faced Super Bowl winning NFL quarterbacks!  ...but I think Eli deserved to win just to make all those truly desperate housewives happy, and to silence his many critics.








Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Big Announcement... Secret Spanko is turning pro

Yes, That's right.  Foregoing my last year of eligibility (thanks to that red-shirt year)... already talked to an agent... projected to be a low round draft pick... going professional.  Hope that doesn't confuse the 5,000 or so of my non-US readers per my blog stats, even if a bunch of those are from questionable.ru sites.  

See, after convincing myself that the ideal relationship between pros and non-pros is that of a pro top and a non-pro bottom, (and reading an extended discussion about professional spankos on fetlife) I realized maybe that was my problem in attracting spankees. I'm sure it had nothing to do with the fact that all my naughty internet time was devoted to creating this blog, or other endeavors rather than looking for a potential spankee.  Nope, must have been my persuasive argument coupled with poor marketing!  

So, henceforth... I, Marky Marks, aka Mr. Marks, aka Secret Spanko, am now available to spank lovely ladies for a small fee.  However, to celebrate this launch, I'm offering quite a special but only to those who act now.  If you contact me within the next 24 months (either via these comments or my email address found in the About Me portion of this blog)  ... Get this- I'll WAIVE the initial fee!  Hurry though... this offer won't last long!  I'm very selective, and slots are sure to fill up fast! (no, er... well, not too much, innuendo intended.)


And besides, I'm such a horrible fisherman, the one time I cast out some Pink bait, the fish are so disgusted they don't even show up where they always do on Tuesday! So maybe I should stick with spanking instead of fishing.  Oh, and one other thing... Someone pointed out via email that I missed a big point in my discussion of the pros... that being: pros are generally far more attractive than non-pros, but that's a double-edged sword because you're far less likely to get any sexual pleasing aftercare from a pro.  Fair enough, and a valid point.  It also jives with my decision to turn pro quite nicely.  After all, I'm so handsome I'll make your ovaries ache not that bad looking and as I pull down your panties I'll not be thinking ANYTHING sexual at all; I'll be thinking about baseball!

In all seriousness... it's been way too long since I've met someone for some quality over-the-lap playtime.  I miss one that moved, another that got a boyfriend, and I especially long for the unfulfilled fun I wish I could have with my lunchtime buddy who lives a few states away.  I'm taking steps to initiate meeting someone, and will, of course keep my readers informed.  However, if you're a Secret Spankoette in the DFW area and are interested...  by all means let me know.  ;)