Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Big Announcement... Secret Spanko is turning pro

Yes, That's right.  Foregoing my last year of eligibility (thanks to that red-shirt year)... already talked to an agent... projected to be a low round draft pick... going professional.  Hope that doesn't confuse the 5,000 or so of my non-US readers per my blog stats, even if a bunch of those are from questionable.ru sites.  

See, after convincing myself that the ideal relationship between pros and non-pros is that of a pro top and a non-pro bottom, (and reading an extended discussion about professional spankos on fetlife) I realized maybe that was my problem in attracting spankees. I'm sure it had nothing to do with the fact that all my naughty internet time was devoted to creating this blog, or other endeavors rather than looking for a potential spankee.  Nope, must have been my persuasive argument coupled with poor marketing!  

So, henceforth... I, Marky Marks, aka Mr. Marks, aka Secret Spanko, am now available to spank lovely ladies for a small fee.  However, to celebrate this launch, I'm offering quite a special but only to those who act now.  If you contact me within the next 24 months (either via these comments or my email address found in the About Me portion of this blog)  ... Get this- I'll WAIVE the initial fee!  Hurry though... this offer won't last long!  I'm very selective, and slots are sure to fill up fast! (no, er... well, not too much, innuendo intended.)


And besides, I'm such a horrible fisherman, the one time I cast out some Pink bait, the fish are so disgusted they don't even show up where they always do on Tuesday! So maybe I should stick with spanking instead of fishing.  Oh, and one other thing... Someone pointed out via email that I missed a big point in my discussion of the pros... that being: pros are generally far more attractive than non-pros, but that's a double-edged sword because you're far less likely to get any sexual pleasing aftercare from a pro.  Fair enough, and a valid point.  It also jives with my decision to turn pro quite nicely.  After all, I'm so handsome I'll make your ovaries ache not that bad looking and as I pull down your panties I'll not be thinking ANYTHING sexual at all; I'll be thinking about baseball!

In all seriousness... it's been way too long since I've met someone for some quality over-the-lap playtime.  I miss one that moved, another that got a boyfriend, and I especially long for the unfulfilled fun I wish I could have with my lunchtime buddy who lives a few states away.  I'm taking steps to initiate meeting someone, and will, of course keep my readers informed.  However, if you're a Secret Spankoette in the DFW area and are interested...  by all means let me know.  ;)  

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