Friday, April 13, 2012

A confession... I can't stand spanking jargon

I'm not quite sure why.  I mean, "Spanko" is about the most spanking jargon word there is, right?  And I use it quite a bit.  Jargon is used because it's understood and conveys meaning quickly to those who are familiar with the subject.  I get it.  But it also annoys me for some reason.  Maybe I think it's just kind of cheesy to use words like this.  Actually I struggled with the name of the blog because I don't like the word Spanko.  I thought about:
  • I'm secretly into Spanking 
  • Secretly into Spankings 
  • Secret Spankophile
  • My Spanking Secret(s)
  • Secretly, I'm into Spanking-Are you?
  • Do you Secretly Like Spankings?
  • I'm a Secret Spankophile
  • I'm a Secret Spanko

I even have the drafts to prove it.  But I finally settled on SecretSpanko because I thought it was sort of catchy.  Still, I'm not all that wild about the word "Spanko" -it's a made up word, and sort of grates on my nerves, but I guess it fulfills a purpose and there's not another word that is a synonym except maybe "spankophile" and that's even more made up sounding than Spanko.

Topping/bottoming - among gay men, this equates to the anal sex penetrator and anal sex recipient of the penetration.  I much prefer spanker/spankee.  Not every spanker/spankee relationship is also a dom/sub relationship, but neither spanker nor spankee are not listed on fetlife as options.  

Switch/Switching- ideally, this is a small branch of, say, a weeping willow tree that's cut and denuded of leaves before being used to spank a bottom and/or thighs.  It has come to also mean one who both spanks and gets spanked.  Acknowledging that it is a widely-used label, I've said in the past that people who are into spankings should embrace the "switch" label, and wear it as a badge of honor that they can take what they're dishing out, and I whole-heartedly meant it.  However, I don't really like this label, because I think it implies that one can just, well, "switch" roles and is fine with either.  Personally, I'm a spanker that can, on occasion, appreciate and even desire to be spanked; but what I get out of being a spanker and what I get out of taking a spanking are so entirely different that I hate to say I can "switch" roles easily.  Still, I can see that like "spanko" there's not another synonym and it's understandable how the term came into use, despite the fact that it annoys me.  On a related note...

"Topping from the bottom" - Every spanking relationship, even almost every encounter is different.  Different personalities, desires, etc... to attempt to water this down and belittle the discussion that precedes it and the way the scene plays out with this term annoys me too.  

OTK pronounced "oh-tee-kay" -fingernails on chalkboard material.  It's an abbreviation for over-the-knee that's useful for chatting, but not a real word to be used in a sentence- please! "Bent over my lap with her ass in the air" sounds so much more exciting!

Diaper position - Maybe it's the dad in me- this makes me think of poop and wipies.  It's not nearly as sexy as "laying on her back holding her legs up so that her sex was entirely exposed while I could spank her lower bottom and thighs, all while watching the delicious ouchy faces she made as I was doing that." But I guess that's the definition of jargon- it conveys the same information in a lot less space.  
Greek (especially used as a verb!) Okay so maybe this is not technically Spanking jargon, but it's a term that I think is funny.  Once upon a time I was talking to a lady that said something along the lines of, "His main interest was not in spanking me.  He loved my bottom, but he just wanted to greek me."  Apparently, "greek" is a euphemism for anal sex, derived from Aristotle and the boys in Athens that had an affinity for well, the boys in Athens.  
Just don't tell that to George Snufflupagous or whatever his name is- you know the guy on TV n the mornings!


  1. Excellent post as always, Mr. Marks. Top marks (again) for subject matter that's not often discussed.

    (I'll be seeing you soon.)


  2. LOL. I am not a big fan of any of the jargon myself.

  3. I don't like the term "spanko" either, but have come to accept it as a necessary evil. "I'm secretly into spanking" is my favourite of the choices above.

    Diaper position - ick! Not a turn-on at all, for me.


  4. I don't like spanko either, but when in Rome...


    P.S. Hope all is going well with your extended family, if you know what I mean:).

  5. lol this is a great post. Its funny because the word spanko makes me cringe for some reason, yet I use it all the time.

  6. Dana- it was actually a post of yours awhile back that sort of inspired me. (I'm just a little more opinionated and like pictures!) Looking forward to it/dreading it. ;)

    faerie- glad someone agrees with me

    Hermione- that's sort of where I am with "Spanko" and agree on the name, guess it's a little too late now. I have nothing against that position, just don't like the name of it!

    Thanks Kitty, and yes. By the the way, didn't know you went to Rome, but I read about your trip to Greece the other day! ;)

    playful little brat- glad you enjoyed this. Honestly this is not really one of those posts that will get a lot of attention but I had fun writing it!

  7. Spanko irks the most. So lacks elegance. But I can't come up with anything better.

  8. Eve Howard of Shadow Lane doesn't like "spanko," either. She says it reminds her of negative terms like "psycho" and "sicko." As for me, I don't have a problem with it, but I know how certain words can make one's flesh crawl.

    Any overused terminology can become trite, I suppose. But as others have mentioned, it serves its purpose. Saying "I'm a spanko" is easier than, say, "I'm a spanking enthusiast."

  9. I think the -o is the problem.

    It's just... goofy. Really goofy. Muppety goofy.

  10. So behind on my comments...

    Emen, you're right. It does lack elegance. On the other hand, spankophile seems like it's trying too hard to be elegant.

    Erica, wow, re: Eve Howard, glad that great minds think alike on this, although I'd not thought of the psycho/sicko thing. But you're right. It definitely serves its purpose, which is why I'll continue to use it.

    Joan- I think you have a point, and welcome to the blog. I just checked yours out, and will have to spend some time on there! wow.