Thursday, May 31, 2012

Guest post by Emen: Thudmuffin


Thudmuffin

Yeah, you. You know who you are, Prince of Polished Paddles. I don’t use the masculine to profile, I just haven’t met that many women who find hurling logs at peoples’ backsides a pleasurable pastime.

I admire your commitment, Thudster, you do persevere. Flying your flag and singing your anthem, I Can Make This Sting.

“Seriously, just listen to me for a minute, I can – I can do it. I can make this 4x4 sting. Come on, you need to try new things. I’m going to put some duct tape around this end so I can get a good grip and you bend over and hold onto something. No, something sturdier than that.”

You’re so sweet and earnest when you try to convince me. You’re so proud to show me these massive slabs of wood you cherish. And I smile and wonder where you keep the hydraulics you need to swing these
things.

And who would let you swing them at them. I’m not saying no thud, never and all sting forever. I appreciate some thud. I want it in the mix. But you run it right into the ground, baby. And you don’t want me. You don’t because I’ll tell you how it would go. You be THUD, I’ll be everything else.

THUD

S**T – does this guy know dry walling or sheetrocking or whatever you call it, cause --

THUD

DAMN – if he miscalculates and drives my head through this wall –

THUD

OWWWW – he better know how to fix it fast, cause –

THUD

F**K – even in my blind Vanilla world somebody’s going to notice –

THUD

STOP – a giant honking hole in the wall and –

TH–

See, that last one didn’t even connect because I respectfully crawled under the bed to get away from you. This can only end in utter frustration for us both.

Go and find your people. Look for the light. You’re going to be much happier there.

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Guest post by Emen: limerick


There once was a lady so Bent
She couldn’t hang on to a Gent
When they spanked  her she clapped
When they kissed her she slapped
And so, one by one, they all Went


Okay so most of this is me writing rather than her poetry, but in those five lines, Emen captures an idea that in my experience is pretty central to the reality of secret spankos (or even not-so-secret-spankos) meeting on spankfinder or fetlife or somewhere and getting together with a playpartner, but something that is rarely discussed on spanking blogs... And something that's probably completely foreign to spankos that can be into spanking with their partner.  When spanko folks get together, there's frequently talk of a safeword, but what about when one party to the kinky rendezvous has different ideas when it comes to intimacy and "comforting" afterward? or becomes enamored and pours their heart and soul out, only to have the other communicate that they're just interested in the spanking part?  
courtesy of Devlin O'Neill's blog



Let's uhm... "face" it- there's taking off of clothes, lots of touching and physical contact, and when over-the-knee, your genitals are inches from each other's.  But it's just a spanking, right?  Have you ever kissed your spanker/spankee?  Did you ever want to but didn't?  This is a fertile area for comments and shared experiences.  Unfortunately I won't be here to respond, but Emen will.  So y'all play nice in the comments section! 

Monday, May 28, 2012

"Happy Memorial Day" is an oxymoron

I'm still gone, and Emen will be back, rest assured, and (I assume) her 1st story was well received, but wanted to take the opportunity to post (in advance) something commemorating Memorial Day. Nothing at all to do with spanking, but I have readers, and I wanted to say it.  Yes, Memorial Day marks the traditional beginning of summer, and is usually a fun time.  But it's also a chance to remember and say thanks to those that have given their life in the service of our great country.  There are a lot of them, and it wasn't a happy day for them, dying painfully in the field or a hospital, or for their families and friends grieving their loss.
America has plenty of problems, don't get me wrong (I won't go into them here) but each of us still have so much to be thankful for, beginning with the fact that we were born here (no offense to my readers in other countries.)

I'll grant that country music is an acquired taste, but thought this Trace Adkins song captured Memorial Day pretty well. (And from among the many youtube videos of the song, this one isn't cheesy or preceded by an all-American advertisement, but is just the song accompanied with a simple, powerful image.)

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Guest post by Emen: Her first time

Dear readers:
I'm off for awhile, and I said I'd planned on having a guest host so the blog wouldn't just sit here dormant for a week or more.  I kind of had mixed feelings about it.  For whatever reason, a few of you tune in to hear what's on my mind.  Do you care what's on someone else's mind? There are a whole bunch of other blogs out there, and I figure that my readership has grown slowly but surely because some of you are curious what I have to say.  So what's the point in having a guest host? 


Part of it, as I said, was not wanting the blog to fall dormant for awhile.  Part of it is that I'm lazy and have run out of canned posts so I can't just schedule several of them to be published while I'm busy.  (And speaking of lazy... I think it's possible to set up an account and have someone actually log in and really guest-host.  Instead, I'm just copying and pasting her stuff and scheduling it to be published while I'm gone.  So maybe it's more like booking a talented halftime performer than a guest host, but whatever.)


Another big part of it though is that I want to share with the world the writing talent of another secret spanko.  I've had several reach out to me and felt like I've gotten to know a few of them.  One of them has even started her own blog!  But with the possible exception of my favorite shortstack of SpankCakes, none of them has a way with words quite like Emen.  She says she's not ready for her own blog, but I wanted to showcase a bit of her work here. 
***update- apparently in trying to get this saved and scheduled, it's popped up on blog rolls all over and when someone clicks on it, it says it doesn't exist- so I'll just go ahead and publish it now! ***

She arrived early. He was still laying out implements, though he’d had no direction from her about which ones to use. She didn’t know. She’d never been spanked. She had no fantasies to tell him, she said. She’d never let herself think about it long enough. She’d had no idea his world existed and she’d thought she was the only one.

He had imagined she might not show at all. She was skittish all the way through the long, patient email foundation he’d built with her. It was more work than he usually invested but he had a fondness for her. She was very young, unmarried, but had a bright sense of humor and a sensitivity he liked. And her awe at this thing he did made him see it differently than he had in a long time.

But he marveled she’d been able to push herself through his door. Her nervousness was overwhelming, it rolled over him like heavy perfume filling the room. He’d never witnessed a full body tremble before.  Even her eyelashes quivered as she stared at her hands.

He knew to trust his instincts and that this was no time to wait for inspiration. He was not a fan of abject terror. He liked to roll out the good cop/bad cop and keep some lightness in the mix. She was taller but smaller than she looked in her pictures. He smiled to himself, that was a first. He led her past the armless chair to a rocking armchair with a high back and sides and sat, pulling her to sit on his lap and relax against his chest. Her heart slammed against him with its chittering beat.

“What do you think is going to happen?” he whispered.

“I don’t know,” she sighed as if she was exhausted. He touched the inside of her wrist with his lips and she stiffened, then smiled slightly. He kissed her knee and ran his thumb down her leg and tapped her ankle and took her shoe off. He threw it backwards over their heads. She laughed out loud.

He undressed her slowly and finally rolled her naked body towards him so he could rub her bottom and run his fingers between her cheeks.

“Now?” he asked, and she nodded into his bicep. He spanked her slowly, increasing the force, pulling her awkwardly against himself to get access to both cheeks, and losing access to the breasts, and reveling even as his left arm went numb at the heaven that is the silk of a woman’s butt warming under a cupped palm.

As her gasps grew louder she began to scramble for purchase, digging her knees into his thighs to try to raise her ass higher. With a herculean effort he pulled them out of the chair in one movement and carried her to the armless chair, realizing as he sank onto it he’d left all the implements out of reach.

She hit the zone faster and more completely than anyone he’d ever seen. She went so deep he couldn’t get a signal, so he stopped when his palm was swollen, burning pulp and he didn’t want it hit any more.  She surfaced slowly as he stroked her with the back of his hand, tried to stand and fell back onto him.

He caught her shoulders and for the first time she looked directly into his eyes. Her pupils were dilated and in their endless depths glittered a lust so primal he caught his breath.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Beating of the Bounds

For several reasons, I've had real estate on my mind lately.  Spanking though is almost always on my mind.  What happens when you combine real estate and spanking?  The Beating of The Bounds.  

The story told to me long ago was that way back when, on the American frontier, when many folks couldn't read, to finalize a land purchase they would ceremoniously walk around the boundary and spank a child at each boundary, or border of the land.  Supposedly the thought, ahem... behind this was that the young person would remember the boundary best if they had a memorable beating there, and they should pick a child because presumably the child would remember it well after the old men who had completed the transaction had passed away. The frontier was a dangerous place- Bears, Comanche Indians, outlaws, untreated venereal diseases, etc... meant you didn't have to worry about skin cancer after a lifetime in the sun, much less heart disease after a lifetime of eating eggs and bacon!

This was the story I heard long ago, and even though I've said in the past that my enthusiasm for spanking was solidified when I read some stories in Penthouse Variations magazines, the fact that I remember this story from early childhood, and had a vivid imagination about the story pegs me as a lifetime spanko.  I have never seen it in any spanking stories or literature though, and wondered if it was completely made up to scare me way back when my parents were buying a new house.  The name "The Beating of the Bounds" always stuck with me, though I'd never looked it up on the internet to find out if it was true until just now..  

Turns out, the "Beating of the Bounds" has very little in common with the story I was told, but there IS a grain of truth to it.  In reality, it seems, if anything, even more bizarre. Not frontier America, but jolly England.  It was not to commemorate a single real estate transaction, but instead apparently a festival of sorts to solidify the church's claim on the land.  The wikipedia entry mentions that "the parochial officials headed a crowd of boys who, armed with green boughs, usually birch or willow, beat the parish boundary markers with them. Sometimes the boys were themselves whipped or even violently bumped on the boundary-stones to make them remember. The object of taking boys along is supposed to ensure that witnesses to the boundaries should survive as long as possible."   So the part about beating young people so they'd remember was accurate, but "violently bumped on the boundary-stones"... yikes!

I prefer the fantasy that to commemorate a single real estate transaction, a young attractive lady was marched out into the woods, and given a switching at each corner of the property to help her remember where the homestead ended. (And these captions will only be amusing to folks that have actually read real property legal descriptions, and to those folks, I apologize because I'm sure I've messed something up.)
"From an iron pin marking the SW corner of the of the NE quadrant of the Davis subdivision of Hazzard County, thence 60 degrees SSE to the banks of the Blue Moose River...
...from the banks of the Blue Moose River, hence 350 feet East to an iron pin...
...hence 30 degrees, 45 minutes NNE for 420 feet...
...hence 375 feet generally west following the meandering path of the Chalk Fork of the Blue Moose River to the point of origin.
Less and except a conveyance of the 3/16ths mineral interest retained by the Coltrane Family Trust, recorded in Book 1864, pages 233-241 of the Hazzard County deed records."


P.S. I'm excited that I actually get to use the "other cultures" tag again!

Monday, May 21, 2012

White Cotton Panties

I love white cotton panties.  It's hard not to love them.  Save your silky sexy almost not there black with red lace thongs... give me white cotton panties any and every day!
Part of the appeal is that unlike the silky "sexy" lacy thong, white cotton panties are an everyday thing, and not meant to be taken off, which just increases the pleasure when you get to do so!  I think it adds a great deal to the naughtiness and embarrassment of undressing when the lady is not dressed in her finest lingerie, but her everyday normal stuff, and white cotton panties certainly fill that bill.  (especially when they're nicely filled out with pale bottom flesh!)
 My inspiration for spanking blog posts is always amusing to some.  Tonight I watched the "director's cut" of Alien starring Sigourney Weaver.  The director in question was Ridley Scott, and honestly even after having watched it before, there's not a lot of more suspenseful movies made since this came out in the late 70's.  The ship is a grungy post-Star Wars version of space that's destined to become the steam-punk of future generations with all the blinking lights around the tiny monochrome computer screen. (And really, why are all the air ducts big enough for a person to walk through? but still...)  I can appreciate how original and artsy it was at the time, and much of it still holds up today.  Below is the best pic I could find of that, but it doesn't do justice to the buttcrack and camel toe revealing scene when Ripley, the main protagonist, strips down to her underwear before the climax of the movie.   Still, it's not just an exploitative reason to see her in her undies- it conveys the sense that she thinks it's over and is relaxing (finally).   
 So with that inspiration, here's some more white cotton panty pics.
just a hint of well trimmed bush


 They're also nice for spanking too!  Did I forget to mention that?  Not only that but when you're spanking over white cotton panties, there's little doubt that they'll eventually be pulled off, whereas sexy thong panties, if you pull them off you're just doing so cause you want to see the naughty bits between... there's really no reason to take a thong off for a spanking that isn't naughty- I used to get irritated at FirmHands spanking clips claiming to be bare bottomed, when the spanking model kept her thong on, but... really, even with a thong, she was literally "bare bottomed" it just wasn't nearly as fun if her panties weren't taken down!

So.... here's to white cotton panties!

Thursday, May 17, 2012

traveling, and why I have respect for spanking models


I'll be traveling soon for maybe a couple of weeks, and not sure how much time I'll have to devote to spanking blogs.  This reminds me of a couple of years ago, when I was, in retrospect, still in the beginning stages of my spanko spanking aficionado journey.   

I was supposed to be in Denver for a couple of weeks for business.  Denver also happens to be the home of Realspankings.com and their family of sites, of which I'd been a member -off and on- for several years.  I thought to myself that I'd be within driving distance of the place where they filmed spanking scenes that I'd followed for years, ever since they were realpayer updates the size of postage stamps!  So I started looking into whether I could get a tour while I was there or something.  I started a correspondence with Betty, their full time employee and spanking model wrangler.  One of the family of sites they have is women-spanking-men.com and she said that at the time they really needed male spanking models.  I'd never taken a spanking at that time, nor had I ever had the desire to.  But I started thinking about it.  You know, it would probably help me as a spanker to have some experience in being on the receiving end, just to see what it's like and sympathize with someone I spank, and know that I could take what I was dishing out, right?  So... she said if I was interested, I'd need to send in some pics to see if they would like to work with me, and if I didn't want to show my face, that was fine, but I wouldn't get paid.   Ookkaayy.... I didn't exactly have a portfolio, had no desire to show my face onscreen, but hoped maybe I could negotiate a lifetime pass to their sites or something.  Sending in pics really scared me though.  However, I'd done the awkward trading pics thing with a few ladies I'd met on spankfinder, etc... before so what's the harm, right?  

About the time I was thinking about sending the pics and whether I even wanted to participate in actually receiving a spanking, much less get one on film, this happened...  
pretty impressive, the aptly named Congressman Wiener
Hey Dumbass- next time don't include your face!
So maybe I was a little freaked out about sending out pics of myself to someone I know on the internet. Thank goodness I'm not a Congressman (though I secretly think I'd do a far better job than most of them!)  I asked Betty if I needed to send pics of my behind, and she replied that nude pics weren't necessary, but would be nice, and that she really just needed some that showed my body.  The only pics I'd sent out before that came close were some in a t-shirt on facebook.  

Was I going to do this? What the Hell?  Here goes... If I'm actually going to do this, I'll go all-in.  I finally understood that it's kinda difficult to take a picture of your own ass.
nice toothbrush, right?


I even sent her a "Full Monty" one, a portion of which is above. (For all my adoring fans- all three of them- if you want I'll send the full pic; but don't get too excited, because I wasn't in an, uhm... excited state when I took this pic- I was a little nervous.)

And then... I waited and waited. It seemed interminable.  Was Betty disgusted at my lack of definition and my beer-gut?  Should I have posed flexing like the Congressman? Was I sufficiently "athletic" enough to be used as a model?  I'd never had body image issues, but I began to wonder... too many cheeseburgers? too much wine? maybe I should've done some push-ups before taking that pic...Why did I decide to send the full nude one when she said that wasn't necessary?! Heck maybe I should've worn my nice watch, not my jogging one!  I'd never felt like my body was being judged for sufficiency like this since 8th grade basketball.

Then after a couple of days, she emailed me back that they'd love to work with me. Whew!  All set to go, working out scheduling, and.... at the last minute the trip gets cancelled for business reasons.  Dammit!

In retrospect, I'm glad it didn't work out.  Had it worked out, I might never have met Dana Kane when I was searching for my 1st F/M spanking. (plus the spanking on that site are fairly brutal!)  But the experience made me think about the spanking models out there.  A few superstars notwithstanding... most of the ladies that show up for a professional spanking shoots are not used to getting spanked, much less getting spanked with some guy hovering around looking through the camera.  And before they even get there, they have their body judged on whether they'd be acceptable as a spanking model.  So my hat's off to all the small-time non-superstar spanking models out there.  I feel like I have a slight inkling what you're going through, and I greatly appreciate your efforts!

Speaking of travelling again... I haven't quite figured out how to work blogger to allow someone else to post, but my readers are in for a treat... I have a frequent commentator lined up to publish some of her stuff while I'm gone- another Secret Spanko - and her stuff is pretty good!  I just hope that my readers start asking for her to be the permanent guest host instead of clamoring for her to take my place!  
She's better looking than Joan Rivers, too!

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

On the other hand...

"You've taken this pretty well so far, sweetie, but this last part is gonna hurt a lot.  It may help for you to have a hand to squeeze, and maybe just as important, I'll need your hand out of the way as we're finishing up.  There we go.  Hold on tight.. Here it comes...."

I couldn't find the perfect illustration for this post.  I'm right-handed, and I love nothing more than to take the right hand of the spankee with my left hand and squeeze it tight as I finish up a spanking.  There's something a little more intimate, and a little more vulnerable about squeezing her hand as she's getting it.

If you're a guy reading this, you've undoubtedly experienced the snuggling up with your lady as you fall asleep only to discover in the middle of the night that your arm has fallen asleep under her and made an awkward attempt to extricate your arm out from under her without her waking up and and her noticing, and accusing you of the hug-and-roll-away, right?  Well, there's a similar awkward conundrum about what to do with your other hand while giving a spanking.  Not all of us are ambidextrous spankers like Dana Kane... Hmmmm - wonder where she learned it?  Probably the vast majority of folks use their non-spanking hand holding the hip of the spankee thusly:
Nothing at all the matter with that.  It's perfectly normal.  But this post was inspired, in part, by this photo on Erica Scott's blog showing that there can be quite interesting things done by the non-spanking hand..
And the variety of other hand activities can be well, quite varied... there's the full body hug...
A little higher or a little lower and this would be plenty erotic!
I guess fondling her rib cage does it for some folks!
There's the guiding hand on top...
There's the grasping of the hair... maybe more appropriate when the spankee is looking into the mirror so you can see her ouchy face...
Nice try Clare, but you're not doing much to prevent her hand interfering with bottom spanks. 
This is maybe the closest I found to my preferred method... See how she's grasping his arm too, reaching out to have something to hold onto in comfort.

Not every spanking is like that one of Erica's a few years ago, and not every spanking elicits an erotic response from "the other hand" but for those that do... there's surprisingly little guidance on what to do with the other hand, and would love to hear from some ladies about what they prefer!




Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Mission Impossible: Spankdar


I'd guess that most people reading this are familiar with the term "gaydar" - the ability to tell if someone is homosexual without being told by that person.  It's not perfect, and it's based on stereotypes... a lisp, a swishy walk, or an interest in interior decorating for a man; a woman that swings her shoulders (rather than her hips) when she walks or wears boots and flannel.  Turns out, there's some scientific evidence that a gaydar is a better than chance predictor of being correct.  But what about a Spankdar?

I think it's far more difficult (if not impossible) to determine if someone you know in real life is into spanking as compared to determining whether they're into people of the same gender sexually.  Plus "gaydar" sort of makes sense because it sounds like radar, whereas "spankdar" is kind of a stretch.   Here's two reasons why:

1. An interest in spanking is far less socially acceptable than being gay, and spankos are not open about their interest.
Well, Duh!  Some people (even some in the public eye) are openly gay, whereas I'm not sure of anyone that's completely openly into spanking.  But there's a lot more to it than that.  There's a guy in my office that everyone knows is gay, and he doesn't proclaim it, but talks about his partner and has pictures of the two of them in his office.  He talks a lot about pop culture and fashion, and we all sort of accept it.  How many spankos have pictures of their disciplinarian on their desk, or talk about spanking-related topics?  But there's more to it than even that... Spankos I think would actively try to hide their interest- at least I do.  There's a lady in my office that's joked several times about getting (or giving) a whoopin' and told stories about what her parents did to her.  Probably a spanko, right?  But would someone into spanking actually make jokes like that?  I'm very much into spanking but have never made those type of comments in public.  It's far too personal, and I sure don't want to raise suspicions.  So just using me for example, if you judge a spanking interest based on a willingness to talk about it in public, your spankdar will be dead wrong.

2. Perceptions of alpha males and submissive women are likely to be wrong- at least behind closed doors.
There's certainly something to stereotypes of masculine men and feminine women.  But that's not always true when it comes to an interest in spanking.  I've talked to a couple of female dommes about this... Their clients are maybe surprisingly successful and on top of the world, but enjoy the occasional opportunity to completely let their guard down, remove the mantle of authority and responsibility, and let someone else take charge.  I can think of three ladies I've spanked that were very successful in their careers and pretty damned assertive in real life.  Maybe because of that, they craved to be taken in hand and spanked by a man.  Had I not met them based on emails exchanged as a follow-up to an introduction on a spanking website, there's no way I would have pegged them as submissive or kinky.  From my admittedly limited experience, one's interest in spanking, and the role played within that interest, is precisely the opposite of what many might expect.

In one of my stories I alluded to this in the fictional introduction.
"...My wife and I are spankos, I guess.  Mostly it's foreplay that turns us on- something we discovered about each other in college.  But on occasion we've spanked each other "for real."  Yes, I said each other. We're both switches, I suppose. I'd say typically about 70/30 it's me giving and her getting just because that seems like the more natural fit to our personalities and sexual identities. Actually it sort of fits the opposite of our personalities.  She's uptight and in control most of the time, and needs to let go and feel like someone else was completely in charge more than I did..."

So... for all those ladies that swoon at the idea of a Don Draper type rolling up his sleeves and taking them over his knee... maybe he goes to see a domme to let loose (and does nothing more than fall to his knees after chasing and catching his wife-- tell me someone else saw that episode.)  Meanwhile that small obnoxious IT guy with self-esteem problems has not just one, but a harem of collared slaves he found on FetLife.  And that cute girl at the office who's always volunteering, always bringing cookies, and remembers everyone's birthday... maybe she asserts herself at home, taking out her pent-up frustrations on her husband's ass.  Now stereotypes became stereotypes for a reason, and there are certainly some dominant Don Draper types that are into being the head of their household and spanking women.  There are plenty of alpha-male spankers and plenty of submissive ladies that like to have their bottom warmed, and dominant women that like to spank and men that just naturally like to serve a strong woman.  But that's not always the case.  And because that's not always the case, a spankdar is practically worthless.  

Me personally, I'm secure in my masculinity, and can appreciate the appeal of "taking off the mantle of authority and responsibility" on occasion, but well... I think a woman's red bottom is a lot sexier than mine!

Frankly, I'm extremely grateful for the rise of spanking on the internet.  The only person I've ever found that was into spankings that I've not found on the internet was a girl in college.  I hinted about it with almost every girl I hooked up with, but she was the only one that completely took the bait.  Unfortunately, she had a bunch of other issues...  Before the internet, I'm guessing that to find a spanking partner, folks had to go through a string of relationships before they found someone that was either into it, or they could mold into being into it.  Now though- one knows whether those they meet online are into spanking, and probably even know a little about what kind of spanking they're into!

I'd love to hear stories from those that were into spanking pre-internet, and if/how well your spankdar has ever served you.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

mowing the lawn, and pubic hair

Lawn mowing is on my mind tonight.  I'll try to eventually relate it back to spanking, somehow.  It'd rained recently, and our lawn mowing guy did not show up late last week, or this weekend.  I sent him a not-so-nice text today, and he swore he would get it done today.  I got home about 6:30, and he had not been there.  I sent another text, even less nice.  He replied that he was on his way, and explained that he had been called in today, and was trying to get to houses as soon as he got off.  He's trying to get a "real job" and is temporary/a substitute at this point.  He's been with us for awhile, and the last thing I want to do is get rid of him because for the 1st time he's a little unreliable because he's trying to attain a better job.  I hope he gets it.  There are other lawn guys, and I can replace him easily, but I don't want to until he doesn't need us, and he's not yet at that point.  It was uncomfortable though.  We're finally sitting down for dinner, and the lawn is being mowed, and I know that he's doing it after working a full day at another job.  I was feeling extremely guilty about those texts, and offered him dinner, which he declined.

I feel like a bit of a chump because I don't mow my own lawn, if I'm being honest.  I actually enjoy(ed) mowing the lawn.  It's one of the few completely mindless activities where one is still active enough that their blood is pumping and I used to love the activity on the weekend where I could do that and my mind plan out the next week or think about something at work in an uninterrupted span of an hour or two.  I truly miss it.  But if someone is going to mow my lawn for me, I'd prefer it be done when I'm not at home and don't have to think about it.  Maybe it's because I feel sorry for him, but I think a part of it is because I feel less manly because I no longer mow my own lawn.    

Once upon a time, in high school, I had my own lawn-mowing business with my friend.  I look back on those times quite fondly.  With a little bit of spark, we quickly carved ourselves a niche and had almost more business than we could handle.  We were certainly doing better than most high schoolers relying on their parents for money or working at a grocery store/fast food place, and whenever it rained... video game day!
And there was that one housewife... I still remember the street name.  She was hot.  And she didn't wear a bra when she offered us a water.  Somehow we decided that it was really hot whenever it came time to mow her lawn and mosquitoes be damned- we took our shirts off.  (Nothing ever came of it, but this was probably the beginning of my older women fantasies!)
This is what I thought I looked like
this was probably closer to reality

I've sometimes wondered what life would have been like had we chosen not to go to school and just focused on our lawn business.  We were at the point of hiring other crews to help us service the lawns we acquired, and left everyone in a lurch when it was time to say, "See ya'... off to college we go!"  (Note to the ladies... if you want to see more, keep reading all the way until the end- a little treat for you)

Speaking of mowing the lawn... "If there's grass on the field, play ball!" -that's kind of a sick justification, but the best segue I could come up with... Anyway, I had an interesting conversation about pubic hair the other day with a fellow spanking blogger.  I'm a fan of pubic hair. I think it stems from the 1st sexual images I saw as a teen, back when Playboy models showed plenty of pubic hair.  But even today, despite the fashion for bare beavers, I still prefer hair down there.   I think there's more to it than just a preference based on the erotic images I saw during my emerging sexuality, though.  There's got to be a reason, whether you believe that's how God made us or whether through millions of years of evolution, for some reason mankind has hair down there (and our armpits) even though those are the two places that most mammals don't.  Go ahead- look at your dog or cat... hair all over, except for their armpits and groin.

So why do we have pubic hair?  I have a theory.  I read once that man is the only animal that has sex in the missionary position.  When you're in the missionary position, facing your partner, fully inserted and grinding crotch-to-crotch... pubic hair rubs together and acts as a dry lubricant.  Any Dad that's helped his son in the Cub Scouts Pinewood Derby knows that you add graphite to the axles.  You might also have experienced an "Indian rope burn" where the skin-to-skin friction can be uncomfortable.  Pubic hair alleviates that, and that's why we have it.  From my (ahem) very limited exposure to pornos- some hot chick doing a reverse cowgirl... no such need for pubic hair, and maybe that's why they don't have any.  But for good ole' fashioned lovin' it serves a purpose.  (maybe even for laying across a thigh getting a spanking too.)  I do know that when a woman is standing with her pants and panties pulled down, it certainly draws your attention right there.  So, in honor of my post about lawn-mowing and discussion about pubic hair... some pictures are in order, right? 
How'd I miss this one for that post on tan lines?!







See there, ladies, I promised a treat for you at the end.  It's amazing what you find on google image search when you're looking for an illustration for sexy lawn mower.  Dude, is that some hot housewife or.... wait, is that your mom in the doorway? Sick! 

Thursday, May 3, 2012

acknowledging some mutual pleasure -my 69th blog post!

I started blogging for my own personal enjoyment.  I still like just surfing around and writing my thoughts and the creative outlet it gives me.  At times, I've been self indulgent.  Occasionally I even get a kick out of a bit of exhibitionism.  I think of this level of enjoyment as the equivalent of masturbation.  If no one were around and I had no readers, I'd probably continue to sit here at my computer a few nights a week and just well, uhm... spew forth my thoughts.

However, I've moved beyond that.  It seems like some people enjoy reading what I have to say.  I love that- and not just because when I hear that  someone loved my post it's    like they're stroking my uhm, well... my ego. (though I enjoy that too).  Instead it gives me real pleasure thinking that people enjoy my reading my blog, and makes me want to be more active and regular in my updates, and please them more.  Who doesn't like making people happy?  I think of this as kind of like teenagers sitting in a movie theater doing naughty things with their hands to each other. We're getting there....

But this blogging experience has gone beyond even that.  What I enjoy even more than knowing that other people enjoy my blog is actually interacting with people that read my blog.  From relatively early on, I've been surprised by the number of people that emailed me.  Maybe it's a reflection of the nature of my blog in that many folks that read it are very reluctant to say anything in public, even an anonymous comment.  I love it when something I say connects with them, and I love it every time someone reaches out to me and tells me their story about how they're secretly into spanking..  I love offering advice, though I'm certainly no role model and far less experienced than some.  I love the interaction in the comments too.  I've had several comments lately that are lengthier than the posts on many blogs.  This interaction leads me to work even harder at writing, which leads to more interaction, in a positive feedback loop that, following this theme, I equate to well... this is my 69th post. Woo-Hoo!  (Another similarity- sometimes I can get distracted and all my private internet naughty time is spent chatting with someone I met from blogging instead of working on a post - kinda like when it feels so good you forget for a moment that you have a job to do too in this position!)

Maybe the culmination of this and the most heart-warming... was recently when I discovered that SpankCakes (another secret spanko and frequent commentator/email buddy) started her own blog,  Flipping SpankCakes and acknowledged me in her 1st post (and you know how much I love 1st posts!)  Go check her blog out. She has an excellent start to her blog, and some great initial experiences. (She has a really nice ass, too.)

Now, all that having been said about how great blogging has been to me, I should also say that I've come to discover that blogging can be a challenge, too.  You don't always feel like writing your thoughts (much less and then editing, er... attempting to edit them- and illustrating them with an eye toward what your readers will enjoy).  When you're doing so in secret, you have a limited amount of private time on the internet.  Time that might be spent doing, well... other things.  

Speaking of which...there's a video I've been emailed a couple of times which is a parody of some new top 40 song called "We Are Young" but the parody's about 30somethings and called "We're Not Young" and it's pretty funny at times. (Sorry, don't feel like embedding it, but here's a link.)  I've watched it over and over though.  The tune is catchy, and at times it makes me feel blessed, and at times it makes me feel even older, because those folks seem so young and are dealing with the things I struggled with awhile back.  Anyway, there really is a coherent point here, and here it is... In that video one of the guys tries to start a blog but gets distracted almost instantaneously on the internet by looking at bikini pictures.  I'm not distracted by bikini pictures, but something slightly naughtier, but you get the idea.  That's happened to me on many nights.  At other times, I can't chalk it up to being easily distracted... I've just been burned out and not wanted to blog for weeks at a time.  At one point, I was so ahead that I had a few sort of generic posts already done, but not published, so that if I didn't feel like working on the blog, I could literally mail-it-in that week.  (Those are all gone now- after only a few months I've exhausted my backlog of posts.)

But back to the happy fun part of blogging and the mutual pleasure positive feedback loop.  I want to say a big thank you to all my readers, my correspondents, and my commentators. (and the fellow bloggers who have helped me get to this point!)  On that note, and at the risk of being a bit forward with you, my dear readers... here are some illustrations- just imagine me like the guys in these pics, but minus a little bit of hair on the top of my head!  Just my readers and me, making each other happy!  Thanks again y'all!

Are you getting distracted again?! you have a job to do too, ya know!

(update- fixed the link to the video.)

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

the future of spanking... 2 competing trends

Trend #1... childhood spankings are becoming far less frequent.  Trend #2... The internet has brought together folks interested in spankings.  What does that mean for the future?

This is not a lighthearted post with lots of sexy pics... And although I've said (and stand by) the justification for spanking as an unpleasant but useful tool in a parent's toolbox for dealing with little children... Just so you'll know.  This is about the exposure of older kids to spanking, and whether that leads to an adult interest in it.

What makes someone interested in spanking?  It's a question that's been discussed and debated over and over.
  • Is it a gene some people have?  
  • Maybe some unexplored mommy/daddy psychological issues?  Maybe (like me) you were familiar with spanking, and were reintroduced to it via porn including spanking as you were entering puberty, and were hooked.  
  • Maybe a partner introduced you to spanking later in life.  
  • Maybe you were familiar with spanking as something that supposedly nice and caring parents/teachers inflicted on others and always wondered about it because you somehow survived childhood and "missed out" on the experience and so have always been fascinated by it.  
**Note that I refrained from linking to any of those ideas that have been discussed on numerous spanking blogs because I don't want to pigeon-hole any blog post authors, but there are several out there expressing each of these ideas.**

It's fair to say that there are a number of theories, and a variety of correct answers, although I don't think that any answer is correct for everyone.  However, I also think it's fair to say that if one were born to people stranded on a desert island and had never been exposed to spanking, that it would be unlikely that an interest in spanking would develop.  I think it's also safe to say that there is most likely a link between hearing about/experiencing a spanking and an adult interest in it.  

Which brings us to Trend #1... spanking of children is on the decline.  Not too long ago, I wrote a  post  about a recent article based mostly on this paper that stated the percentage of American parents that approve of spanking was still over half at the time the paper was published (1995) but had declined significantly from a similar study thirty years before. I made a quick little excel chart showing the results of the two studies, as well as a trend line extending to the present:
But that's just a couple of studies... one can also read Steven Pinker's best seller about the decline of violence and fewer wars and a lower crime rate... and the decreasing spanking of children.

Here's another graph taken from this blog that shows trends in American attitudes toward spanking. From 1986 to 2010, the percent disapproving/ strongly disapproving (green and yellow) almost doubled from 17 percent to 31 percent.


So there's a downward trend in "real" spanking of children.


On the other hand, the adult spanking world is more active and connected than ever.  Prior to the internet, there were a few spanking groups, and I even ordered some stories in the mail... but there weren't a bajillion blogs and fetlife and spanking video sites and bunches of munches and parties everywhere.  It's possible for someone that's had this secret kink to act on it in ways that were virtually impossible just a couple of decades ago.  Spanking is just now on the outer edge of mainstream.  Sure, there've always been a few spanking scenes in movies (McLintock! etc...) but the movies didn't have spanking as a central theme like "Secretary" until after the dawn of the internet.   I was reading an account of the latest MadMen episode on a website ultimately owned by Disney that referred to a character "topping from the bottom." just yesterday.  There's a best seller about a woman who experiments in spanking play. So there's an upward trend for adult spanking.  I could not find a decent graph of this, but I dare someone to prove this hypothesis wrong..  

So what do these two trends mean to us spanking enthusiasts?  I read something not too long ago by a spanking blog author saying she didn't understand people that got into spanking later in life.  She'd always been fascinated and had a love/hate relationship with spanking since childhood.  I get that confusion, because I've been interested/fascinated in it about as long as I can remember.  But I think it's possible for someone to first be exposed to it later in life and find they like it.  At least, I hope so... because otherwise based on these trends, and based on my assumption that a lifelong interest in it has some connection to exposure to spankings during childhood... the pool of folks exposed to it at an early age will quickly virtually disappear, and those interested in it now will enjoy the connectivity of it but then find that it quickly vanishes as future generations don't suffer childhood spankings.

As an aside... That 1995 study showed that in addition to a declining acceptance of spanking as a response to childhood misdeeds from similar responses 30 years ago... there was a big difference in the socio-economic responses.  Whereas fifty years ago the responses were the same, in 1995 the proclivity to accept spanking was much less among the more educated and Caucasian respondents.   However, (not passing judgement here, just posting another interesting graph I found)... Maybe since America is growing more conservative, the attitude toward spanking will change.  There seems to be a clear link between voting for the Republican in the last presidential race and willingness to spanking children...this from a Washington Post blog.
Would love to hear your thoughts on this one...