Wednesday, January 30, 2013

the $1 section hairbrush

True confession: I love to go grocery shopping.  And when I do, I always stop by the dollar aisle.  Can't help it.  I've picked up some truly worthless junk there, and we probably have some out-of-date condiments still in our fridge courtesy of my excursions to the clearance section on the dollar aisle.  But the other day, I found this flat-backed hairbrush for $1.  Yes, it was "Stylin'" and I took a pick intending to write a post (okay another post) making fun of cane-iac and sharing a secret spanko tip on purchasing implements.  I mean, it looks like a serious hairbrush and I got it for $1, right?
But a funny/sad thing happened.  I used it for a part of one spanking, and it delivered a solid whappy type sound and according to her a thuddy type sensation, but I could tell it didn't hurt nearly as much as my old solid wooden hairbrushes.  In fact, after a few whacks, it was obvious (painfully obvious?) that this hairbrush was plastic and relatively lightweight.  

But then, not too long after that, my favorite no-longer-a-spanking-virgin told me she wanted to really feel a hairbrush spanking.  Thinking I should go (fairly) gentle on her, when it got to the point of bringing her back over my knee and this time with a hairbrush, I decided that this new black hairbrush was the way to go.  Whoops.  After a few whacks, the handle broke off.  She kept the handle as a souvenir, but here's a pic of the same hairbrush showing the handle broken off.  Don't worry- she got really good hairbrush spanking- I come prepared.
Despite that, needless to say, she was quite proud of breaking her 1st implement.  A broken implement (especially a broken hairbrush) can be sort of a badge of honor, I guess.  But I thought my readers might want to know that they should not be fooled by the clearance aisle/ dollar section - I suppose you get what you pay for when it comes to spanking implements.  

Thursday, January 24, 2013

visiting the local spanking pub/bar

I Love England.  Seriously.  There are a lot of Americans who are proud of their Irish roots, or their Scottish roots, and some of us I guess should be proud of our Scotch-Irish roots.  One sets of my grandparents was very proud to be Scotch-Irish.  But based on the other names that came up in an ancestral search, I'm pretty much at least half pure British.  And it's a funny thing- there's not a British hero to celebrate, like William Wallace or Rob Roy or St. Patrick.  There's not a special British drink like there is Scotch or Irish Whiskey.  No British-specific holiday as far as I know unlike the Irish one that comes after Valentine's Day.  I guess the British just aren't that great.  Not like they conquered half the planet back a few centuries ago, or developed the most widely used language today or anything. Not like they colonized America or stood up to Hitler or anything.  The English are just a bunch of puny pale-skinned crooked teethed punks, right?  

But they do have something cool-  they have these neighborhood pubs where folks go to drink and socialize.   I've never quite experienced it like that.  I suppose other people in other parts of the world have something similar.

I mean, there were a couple of favorite college bars where I could go to by myself and know that I'd run into a few people I knew, but those were crazy college years, and there's nothing like that now.  On the other hand, I've been to London once.  We didn't entirely stay in the tourist spots, and I enjoyed it immensely.  I also enjoyed getting into some arguments with the locals at neighborhood pubs about George Bush, "Maggie's" legacy and international politics, which became less heated when I said that that my aunt had traced our names and come up with legacy family names of Huntington and Sheffield.  Okay, so if I'm being totally honest here, that had nothing to do with those discussions being less heated- they became less heated when I stood up and he stood up and and both my wife, her friends, and this guy's friends were able to become the voices of reason.  Then feeling mighty magnanimous, I took a big dip of Copenhagen, and ordered a couple of shots of Jack Daniels, and offered this punk one of them, smiling as he sniffed and choked it down.  

But still, I love the concept of a local pub, or bar.  I truly wish I had a place like this close to my home.  A place to go after work to hang out with like minded people and shoot the bull.  But I haven't.

However, I think I've found just such a place for spanking folks, and after awhile of wondering whether I should risk ruining what they have, I visited there once again last week and they are in favor of some new folks coming in to chat.  So go to the Happy Tails forum here -it's an old forum that's honestly seen better days. The most recent posts are from December.  The forum is pretty much dead.  Like those pubs in England though, it's full of history and used to be frequented by some well-known folks.  But.... check out the links in the upper left-hand corner, especially the one that says "visit our chat!"  Okay, so here's the link: (you'll have to click through a couple of yes's on the pop-ups. when clicking the link, but don't worry.)  It's actually a small but vibrant (and neglected) part of the spanking internet.  Sort of it's own little island of folks hanging on to history, and it reminds me of my experiences in an English pub a few 

You can pick out a name, and they're not picky.  Any name pretty much will do.  You don't even have to have a password set up.  It's just a few folks, talking about spanking on a handy internet format where you can be as open, or as not, as you might prefer.  Heck most of the time they're not even talking about spanking.  It's still a cool little spot in the world of spanking on the internet.  "Ed" is always there but rarely speaks.  Micheal is always full of wisdom. (He's also practically a neighbor of mine and has appeared as a spanker in videos.)  There are regulars from Australia and the two farthest extremes of Canada.  Most of the regulars show up late at night (American time).  Even if the regulars aren't there, it's an easy place to go and chat with someone you've been talking to, or would like to talk to.  I've said before that had the best chat site among the spanking personals sites out there.  I was wrong.  If you want to be amused, check out the comments on my post talking about that site that continue well after it was posted.

I highly recommend this tiny little chat site though, and I'll add it to my links at the top of the blog.

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Taking her spanking virginity

Recently I was honored to be given the chance to give a spanko the spanking she'd dreamed about receiving for a lifetime.  I'm going to break one of my own rules here. I decided awhile back not to talk about my real life spanking play partners contemporaneously. You'd think doing so is a normal and natural thing here- I mean, it is a spanking blog after all, right?  But there are a bunch of reasons for me to not do that: for their privacy; for my privacy; because I could write about it and in my honesty unintentionally hurt their feelings. What if it didn't go well? What if it didn't go well and I knew they read this blog? If I just wrote about my latest experiences, there would be weeks- heck months- that go by without any blog posts. So for the most part I've intentionally limited myself in writing here about my recent play partners. 

But there was something special that happened recently, and I just have to share. 

Since the new year I've spanked a couple of ladies. One culminated in pretty much a perfect scene. She's active in the local spanking scene and was cute and full of personality.  We hit it off, dealt with some real issues, and she took a heckuva spanking. I found a semi-relevant reason/excuse to get her naked. (I like nudity, what can I say?)  She was brought to real tears and I continued spanking as she rode out a good cry. She was grateful and happy and we plan on meeting again. I'm not saying all this because she might read this blog.  Well, okay I am, but I really wouldn't change a thing about the time we spent together; it was a scene involving two experienced spankos who knew what they were doing and did it well. 

But that's not enough to get me to break my self-imposed rule. The other spankings I gave recently were truly special, and I just have to share. 

I took a young lady's spanking virginity. She wanted her very first spanking, and I had the honor of doing so. Now, I've given a 1st spanking before, but it was to ladies that were really more into bdsm and mostly just curious about spanking. However, I know enough to recognize a true spanko, and this young lady certainly is. Let's see... a fascination since childhood, it turns her on and she can't explain it. An obsession with old movies showing scenes of spankings. She thought of it as something wrong with her. She found on accident because she was looking for a spanking and lives in, well...  near me.   Since then she's looked at several spanking video websites, and watched their sample videos over and over but has always been afraid of subscribing because what if she got in trouble for that showing up on her credit card?  She's never heard of fetlife or spanking blogs. I thought I was relatively young in the spanking community, but she's younger than me by more than a decade.  In short, this was a young, cute, impressionable young lady and pretty much every spanking top's wet dream.  

After a lengthy series of emails, we met first in the parking lot of a drug store that was on both of our way to work.  
"wow, you're cute... and normal!"
"you're pretty cute too!"
"Oh my gosh Ican'tbelieveI'mdoingthis!!!"

So after discovering that neither of us were creepy to the other, a kinky rendezvous was set.

Now I wish I could say that I took great lessons from taking a young lady's sexual virginity in years past, but frankly, in retrospect, those times I was probably awkward and clumsy too.  However, I did take one piece of advice... be gentle.  The spanking was almost entirely with my hand.  Her cute butt took it well.  But as fitting a mind full of a lifetime of fantasies, she had some specifics in mind.  She wanted me to grab her arm behind her back when she tried to reach back and protect herself.  She wanted to try the belt and the hairbrush.  She wanted to watch me roll up my sleeves before spanking her.  I tried to fulfill all those too... but relatively gently. 

The first spanking, full of this relative gentleness, safewords, and checking on her, was beyond her dreams.  She was dripping wet, and giddy afterwards, full of comments about how "Oh my Gosh! it really hurt! I had no idea!" but at the same time, "I really wish you'd not held back.  I could tell you did.  Next time it's okay.  I want to cry."  Lots of hugs afterward, and assurances that she was okay.  Actually she was thrilled.  And I felt a special emotion that I'm not sure I can describe.  Rather than taking her spanking virginity, I felt like I had truly given something to someone who had been craving it for so long... like I had given something rather than taking something, and it was a wonderful feeling.  I know that may come across as totally self-centered, but I really felt a warmth and joy in fulfilling her lifelong fantasies that's hard to describe.

We scheduled for a week from that day for her second spanking. We talked about her first spanking, and about how she wanted a strict disciplinarian and a punishment scenario, rather than a "let's see how you can handle a pretend but real spanking" scenario.  The generation difference was apparent in her emails "I want u to make me call u sir when u use ur belt n its ok if I cry" but I understood what she was saying.  Sort of funny thing happened though.  She got a real speeding ticket between our first and second meeting.  Then she was late to our kinky rendezvous. 

"I'm so sorry! I took the wrong exit! you're not mad, are you?"
"We'll discuss it when you get here."
"Oh my gosh!"

I tried my absolute best to be serious and firm when she got there, and gave her one heckuva spanking.  Belt in a variety of positions, and the hairbrush as well, and much more extensively than the first time.  The whole time I was smiling on the inside realizing how she was fulfilling her long-held fantasy.  Though she struggled, and I held her tight, I didn't quite bring her to tears, but afterward said she loved it.  We snuggled a lot more the after the second time, feeling even more comfortable with each other.  

It's a great honor, a great privilege, and a great responsibility to bring someone with a lifelong fascination with spanking "into the fold" if you will, and I was fortunate enough to do so here recently.  I hope I was able to open her mind, her heart, and her bottom into accepting and embracing this thing that we do.  Just had to share, and hope y'all enjoy.


Thursday, January 10, 2013


The other day I was on fetlife and read a comment about how "...Blah, blah, blah, it's just butthurt spanking content providers that say that."  It made me chuckle at the unintended irony.

Butthurt is an internet word. It's sort of an internet meme. (That link provides a far better explanation than mine, and actually credits the origin of the word to the reaction after a spanking.)

The Urban Dictionary defines butthurt as:

"An inappropriately strong negative emotional response from a perceived personal insult. Characterized by strong feelings of shame. Frequently associated with a cessation of communication and overt hostility towards the 'aggressor.'"

or, more succinctly: 

"Getting your feelings hurt, being offended or getting all bent out of shape because of something petty or stupid."

Perhaps it's fitting that I post this topic as the college football season is now, uhm, behind us. Longtime readers know I'm a big fan of college football.  "Butthurt" first entered my personal lexicon when it was used extensively on college football message boards a few years ago.    College football message boards are perhaps the only place where boring older professionals regularly interact with younger, far more internet meme-attuned actual college students.  The term "butthurt" gets used a lot on those forums, particularly regarding conference realignment. For example:

"There are a bunch of reasons Nebraska left the Big XII for the B1G, but their butthurt after the questionable clock and 1 second loss to Texas in that last championship game might have been the catalyst."

"Mizzou is a terrible fit in the SEC, and a much better fit for the B1G than Rutgers, but they wouldn't dream of changing now out of pride and butthurt from getting rejected a couple of years ago."

These are very polite examples I came up with just now. In reality message board material was more along the lines of... "You think the fAggies are butthurt now? Just wait until the a$$ pounding they'll take next year!" (note dollar signs used to still communicate but get around profanity filters; further note that this didn't exactly happen this season with the football team, but sometimes, it happens.  oh yeah, it does.)  

I can't overemphasize the number of times I saw "butthurt" used in the posts talking about conference realignment. The funny thing was- it really fit! Universities (or their boards) were indeed acting in ways that made you think their actions were motivated by, well, butthurt.  I think the beginning of this particular Internet meme coinciding with the realignment talks which created a situation where the phrase (or word) was used by just about every poster on those boards. I'll never forget that summer hearing a professional use "butthurt" correctly in a business context. I chuckled at that too and someone else said "I think you've been reading too much ____ (the name of his school's message board) and conference talk!" And just about every guy there laughed because we all knew exactly what he meant.

Anyway, while the term is applied easily while talking about college football, one might should refrain from using "butthurt" when talking about the spanking industry.   

Monday, January 7, 2013

How many spankos are secret spankos?

My friend Dana Kane has an interesting survey up on her blog about whether spanking is your secret, but I'm somewhat hesitant to encourage my readers to take it, because, well... I'm guessing that a larger chunk of my readers are secret spankos than the percentage of spankos as a whole, and I'd hate to skew her numbers.

Her numbers, so far, show that about 60/40 spankos are on their own vs. spankos with a spanking partner, and about the same percentage (43%) have told their spouse.  By the way, posting polls on blogs, even on blogs with many readers is notoriously risky.  Anecdotal info is that very few readers participate.  The fact that she had right at 200 responses as of a few days ago is pretty impressive. 

Another interesting tidbit from Dana's results- a little over half say they're somewhat active in social media involving spanking but still 40% are lurkers and/or newbies.  (I think a lot of true lurkers probably didn't respond to the survey, but still...)  

I've felt intuitively that there's a large chunk of the spanko population that keeps their interest in spanking a secret, but there's very little evidence in support of that.  I think this has to be the case based on the number of commercial spanking sites that are supported (plus all the secret folks who keep spanking video pirates in operation) plus the number of readers of blogs and viewers on spankingtube vs. the number of people vocal about their spanking desires on the internet. It's safe to say that Dana's survey results so far support my theory that there are a whole bunch of spankos out there who keep their interest well hidden.

On the other hand, earlier this year Eve Howard shared with me some preliminary results of an extensive survey she created about spanking involvement.  I said at the time I'd wait to talk about it until the results are published.  If they have been published, I must have missed them.  However, I'm not divulging anything well, secret, to say that her results showed far more openness and a lack of secrecy among the survey participants than I anticipated, and would seem to be contradictory to Dana's results.  

I think both Dana's results and Eve's results are to an extent a reflection on their audience. Dana's a professional spanker, and much of her audience is, I'm guessing, clients of hers and folks who wish they were.  The heavily F/M drift of her audience might play a role in this as well.  Dana's great, as I can attest.  But (and this is a broad generalization, I know) folks willing to hire someone to spank them are more likely to be folks that are not having their spanking desires met by a partner.  I think Dana's audience is likely to be more secretive. By the way, her most recent video is of her paddling a redhead- I swear we didn't coordinate this!

Eve Howard, on the other hand, is also a professional spanker, but is better known for running ShadowLane.  They host the largest and oldest spanking parties, and have been making high quality movies for decades- the kind of movies that are appreciated by serious spanking aficionados. As I explained to Eve at the time, if the spanking industry were compared to booze, ShadowLane would be a well respected Napa vineyard.  But lots of folks picking up a six pack on their way home, much less those college guys picking up an 18 pack of keystone light (a/k/a newbies), probably haven't heard of this fine wine (much less participated in their survey).  Eve's survey was promoted by ShadowLane, and on fetlife, which is full of well, to continue the analogy, folks that ought to be in AA.  (I'm on fetlife and making fun of myself there too.) I think her survey was answered mostly by serious spankos who are more likely to be really involved in the scene.

I'm not sure if either captured a true census of spankos, though I salute both of them for trying.  I still think there are a whole bunch of folks out there who are not connected with other spankos, but who have strong desires about spanking; a whole bunch of folks out there who are just consumers of spanking on the internet, but have not (yet) made their voices heard.  I may be wrong, and may have no way of proving it, but I sure don't think so.  I hope some of those secret spankos out there enjoy this blog and can at least take comfort in knowing that they're not alone.

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Do spankings hurt redheads more? or less?

That's actually a far more interesting question than you might think.  I was reading this fascinating and horrifying article about consciousness during surgery, and buried in it was a statement about how anesthesiologists adjust medication levels for individuals, giving more to known drug users and more to redheads.  Wait WHAT? Apparently it's accepted as fact that redheads need more pain medication.  I didn't believe it until I searched for it.  Don't believe me? Google "redhead and pain."   It seems there's a real difference in how redheads feel pain.  Or maybe scientists just enjoy torturing redheads.  There sure seem to be a lot of studies on it.  Yes, there's a control group of non- redheads, but still...

But wait...

I'm not as interested in ice baths or electrical shocks, how about... spankings?  Redheads represent roughly 2% of the population, or 6% in the Northern Hemisphere.  They sure seem to have a disproportional representation among spanking models, though. 

One can't really talk about redheads and spanking in the same breath and not mention two names.  One is Amber.

It's been awhile since I've subscribed to her site, but I'm a fan.  She has amazing high resolution movies, and they occasionally get very sexual with her well endowed man. (Heads up though, she calls him "Daddy")

Another is Jessica.  Her site hasn't had new material in years but it still has more great content than a lot of newer sites.  
There are many many more.
Crash of
Maybe it's they way redheads' pale skin marks up so nicely...
Of the 2012 spankee of the year nominations on thespankingspot, at least one fourth are redheads. Seriously- I dare you to go through his recent posts showing updates to spanking video sites and notice just how many of the models have red hair.  It's WAY more than 6%!!
Caroline Grey

Veronica Ricci
There are even those who try to capitalize on the appeal of redheads... though I'm pretty sure that's not the hair color their creator gave her.

I admit this topic fascinates me in part because I'm, I guess, a half redhead.  Yes, one of my parents was a redhead, and I had red hair as a child.  It's brown now- what's left of it.  I know I have half the redheaded gene though.  I have naturally pale skin, and mark easily from a spanking.  My public hair still sort of has a red tinge, and on those rare occasions when I try to grow out a beard, like on a ski trip, my whiskers are sort of red too.  Actually the last time I tried this there were flecks of gray, so probably won't try it again!

But here's hoping a medical scientist somewhere incorporates spanking into the latest study of redhead pain. I'm awfully curious.  But here's the real unanswered question regarding how redheads handle pain:

Wait for it...

How does a ginger handle ginger?

P.S. if you've made it this far, I'm guessing you have a thing for redheads.  Here's your reward- a hot redhead tumblr blog.

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Putting the holidays behind us...

It's that time.  Finally.  Time to take down the tree, take down the lights, drag the boxes back in in and put them up... again.  What do we do with all this leftover turkey, ham, and champagne in the fridge?  Cowboys not in the playoffs.  We need to go through the kids toys and make room/donate/hand down.  This creates annual conversations that are extremely interesting when we start out trying to convince the kids that there are those less fortunate that need their old toys, but somehow end up with us squirming trying to answer questions about "Why doesn't Santa visit children in Africa?"

It's time for the annual "No Fun" diet.  You know, no fried food, fast food, sweets or alcohol.  It will last awhile.  Roughly until the Super Bowl.  

This year has been remarkable.  Every year media outlets talk about the year in review, and this year there was a whole lot to talk about- Olympics, elections, hurricanes, mass shootings, Apocalypse avoided, etc... On a more personal scale this has been an extremely extremely eventful year full of changes- mostly good.  On a scale that y'all care about, it's been extremely eventful too.  I have a policy of not writing about my personal spanking adventures for the most part, but who would have thought at the beginning of the year that I'd have as many spanking adventures as I have had? Certainly not me!  Apart from private fun, it's been the 1st full year of my blog, I attended my 1st spanking party, and put my first story up too.  It's been quite an eventful year on so many fronts, it's been fun, and I wouldn't trade the experiences for anything.

That having been said, I always look forward to January.  It's a nice long boring month with no holidays.  It's maybe the most "normal" month on the calendar.  On a larger scale, I'm kind of hoping that 2013 is sort of the January of years.  Nice, normal, and low stress.  Probably just wishful thinking fueled by holiday exhaustion. But there's always hope!

Here's to 2013... cheers! (Toasts you with a glass of the leftover champagne -because we bought a lot but in reality we're now old fogeys and didn't drink half of it, plus we'd better finish this off in a hurry before we start the "No Fun" diet!)

P.S. Kathy Griffin again is practically begging for a spanking with her New Years Eve antics.