|who says politics and spanking don't mix?|
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
I disagree with William Saletan
I'm scared to write this post. I'm a secret spanko, after all. I genuinely hope that William Saletan doesn't link to it and bring unwanted attention to my little tiny blog. Sometimes I like to mix politics with spanking.
As I've said before, I'm a frequent reader of Slate, and he's a moderate writer with whom I often agree. But I feel compelled to call him out. As I've said before, in the past I've been surprised just how many stories on this somewhat highbrow internet magazine deal with spanking. But last week he wrote an article in response to a NYTimes story about how BDSM was becoming mainstream saying, basically, that folks interested in BDSM are experiencing a lifestyle, not an orientation, that by definition hurts people. And he compares BDSM to gay and lesbiansism and says that BDSM will never become mainstream because it's a choice involving violence. Seriously, before you read the rest of this post, please click on and read his article.
Sure enough, he received some negative feedback. Even some from Jillian Keenan, that self-professed spanko who was widely embraced by the spanko community following her groundbreaking confession as a spanko. He received enough negative feedback that he was forced to write a defense of his original article. In it he again stated that BDSM is different from other alternative lifestyles because it can lead to violence. His main point, and I quote, is that "S&M, and to a lesser extent dominance/submission, raises moral problems different from those raised by homosexuality. It touches on questions of violence and abuse."
So, in the words of many business consultants throughout this land, lets "unpack that"... violence in the form of hitting to inflict pain- is restricted to mostly the women's buttocks. And it's with her consent. Always. Is it different from homosexuality? Well, in many cases, the desire to spank is inherent long before puberty. I remember being fascinated with spanking well before I found women to be sexually attractive. I'm not alone.
I'm not into abuse of any kind, but I'm fascinated and sexually aroused by the sight of women being spanked. As are many other folks. In fact, according to a Durex study of sexuality in 2004, over 40% of Americans were interested in spanking as foreplay. That's higher than any other 1st world countries except for Spain and Macedonia.
Now, in the defense article, he wrote a follow up piece responding to critics, and generally I salute him for doing so. Some of those critics did a decent job of destroying his arguments. But they didn't do enough for me. Let me add to their arguments... you mention everything from rape to butterfly boards- which I've never encountered- in your accusations about BDSM... I'm curious about how many rape victims proclaim that their altercations were the result of a rapist wanting to engage in BDSM related activities vs.old fashioned heterosexual penis into vagina rape? How many kidnappings, gang rapes, etc... had to do with anything related to BDSM vs. good ole fashioned heterosexual fucknut sexual violence?
Until you can answer those questions, I'll just say that you're wrong, and that actually an affinity, even a sexual affinity for spanking is, or should be, as protected a right as is an sexual affinity for those of the same sex. This topic is far from over. However, I guess I disagree with his attitude and judgments, but in reality, I agree with his conclusion... BDSM (and spanking) is not likely to be completely accepted anytime soon. But we're working on it.
at 2:10 AM